I use to go headstrong and headlong into all of this. But now I realize that I should have just guarded it all. That would have prevented my fall. For now there will be only memories to recall.
Memories...I guess the event of holding on to nothingness. So this is what our relationship has been reduced to.? Our adventures use to acrew, but now there is only this feeling of BLUE. But you tell me that is what you are holding onto. I guess this is what things ahve been reduced to.
I had allowed all of me into all of you and now I just seem like a fool. From us swimming in the pool to laying on the beach. I had looked forward to so much more and now that part wn't even bive me a start.
I am supposed to just cut it all off and just hold onto what use to be. But if I did that then all of these feelings would be for naught. I guess that is what makes sense to women but definitely not me. I desiered to continue making more and more memories. I wanted to open up my soul and my very being, but how could that be possible anymore?
I didn't want to take this step back but she forced this into existence. Now I have to debate even continiuing. What good is there to go from lovers to friends? She says she wants to be friends and strengthen the friendship side of our relationship. But what is there going to be left when everything else decays? How are we going to have anything left to work with, when all we do is see each otherr once in a while, with no kissing or anything? So I guess I just need to shake her hand when and if I see her. No affection = no feelings expressed, no emotional content and no needs being met.
What good is stepping back when there may not be anything left to step back to? How are things just going to be on hold until she decides to love and be with me again? So things are supposed to be magically alright after all this I guess.
hmmmm.....interesting
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