It's been a while. Sorry I left without a beat to step to...
There has so much that has been going on definitely. From the run to ny because of the parental unit focused on this shit with his worthless ass brothers estate. A run to atlanta. Even got an anime convention in there lol. I said no to going back to ny this last week though. I have no time for that bullshit anymore.
There have been firsts, adventures and all with babycakes and little one. The learning and growth continues. Planning for the House of Havoc continue to be in full swing and being implemented. It takes a lot to get things planned out, scheduled and done with us. red is doing her thing.
My wife's birthday passed last month and our 10 year wedding anniversary is coming up in a couple of months. It has definitely made me realize I miss her and the rare type of woman that she was. It reminded me that I walk alone now.
People ask how can you be alone in a crowd or in a relation? It is really simple. The type of individual or individuals you around can still allow you to be completely alone and disconnected. I disconnect normally but I have been overdrive in the last little over a year now. I have lessened the buffer of my tolerance, expectation and application.
I also had to laugh and be contemplative of how I am seen and everything in the community now. babycakes and little one were talking about people interested in me. I just laugh at them and tell them they are blind. But when we had the conversation about people in the community taking notice I had to ponder that for a moment. I haven't paid attention to much of the community in response to myself. it was pointed out respect and people looking. I am like ok. But hell I had to blink when I asked to do something or brought up when I am nowhere around in a positive manner. Humbled I had to recognize it.
So many things that I want and need to do. But I have the Cabin trip, Bahamas and Spanksgiving coming up and then going to finally make it to a leather conference and Master slave events.
Some more thoughts on collaring and the collarling ceremony have to be sorted through and decided.
Moves,movement and altering of everything is slowly coming online. And next year the House will be moving at light speed into the future. Damn. I can't wait!
