This is what the males and females feel dealing with lil red. I had to chuckle as I listened and looked at the lyrics and it fit superbly. Even had the red dress and all.
The Black Widow
lmao
Friday, April 08, 2016
Poetry Button Up: It's Time or Battle
Button Up It’s Time for Battle
The metal thud
Followed by the
mechanical clicks
Locked in
Now I am locked and
loaded
Protected from
Emotions and feelings
The boom, boom, boom
Of heavy duty 300mm
barrel
The nonstop sounds of
the machine guns
My heart is solid
So loving
Yet encased in
vibranium
No how
No way
You will get me with
Another end run on me
I am Ashford and Simpson’s
Solid
Solid as a
Frozen, petrified, asteroid
planetary rock
No more feelings
Is what I got
Pockets full of
Empty emotional content
As the battle rages
The memories of my
heart
Available in triage
Steels me for one
more eternity
I see
Understand and feel
Love
Heart
Soul
Rolling over dead
Hearts and souls
Crushed beneath me
My grin and smile
glows
I can’t stop
Won’t stop
Until I have
destroyed all enemies
And love and my heart
Can rejoice freely
Free to be the loving
entity
Free to once again be
a
Super Nova
Instead
I just battle on
From the
chocolatezeus collection 4/8/16 ©
Thursday, April 07, 2016
A Look at the Decisions
I took a hard look at the decisions today concerning human interaction. I got a nice reminder today of making sure to play the long and short game of this on going battle.
My prediction was true and correct. Another mistake on top of the mistakes was made. And I capitulated in it's creation unfortunately.
I allowed something to escape from my internal prison again. And of course there will be even more prices from this to be paid.
Lessons of realized ignorant stupidity.
Yeah, you got me.
Time to regroup, dig deep and bring out the scorched earth reality.
Thank again for another reminder in reality. And why I am and have to be more of who and what I am.
My prediction was true and correct. Another mistake on top of the mistakes was made. And I capitulated in it's creation unfortunately.
I allowed something to escape from my internal prison again. And of course there will be even more prices from this to be paid.
Lessons of realized ignorant stupidity.
Yeah, you got me.
Time to regroup, dig deep and bring out the scorched earth reality.
Thank again for another reminder in reality. And why I am and have to be more of who and what I am.
Tuesday, April 05, 2016
Poetic Expression: Intimate a Peril
This idea and concept popped in my head with the billions of other things as usual. and I was actually able to get this one out of my head in time before it died under the information rubble. I liked the thought when it came up but I am not sure if it came out as well as I felt it should.
Intimate a Peril
In your bra and
panties
Your camisole and
baby doll
Even your g string
and
Thong, tha thong,
thong thong
You have your armor
fully on
Buttressed in more
than a
Shaper or corset
You wear your Bismarck
style
Fortress always
From dusk past dawn
As you sing and hear
Me ‘Shell Ndegéocello
and India Arie
Sing about hair and
being yourself naturally
The prominence in the
word and meaning of
Natural and naturally
Evade you craftily
No evasion
Just your Dale Earnhardt
impersonation
Of the fast and
furious
Leaving behind
Invulnerability
Replaced with
Things that are
fleeting
You continue to drive
in circles
Clamped to this dream
Know me
Be with me
Stay away
Get away from me
The see saw moods
swing
As intimacy lies on
the whims
Of this Sybil style
Creatine mix
Tailor made
Blueprint and mold
One of a kind
Your wear it well
Inability
Fear of vulnerability
Long distance feeling
This intimate a peril
Sells so well
It is always coming
off the shelves
From the
chocolatezeus collection 4/5/16 ©
Monday, April 04, 2016
I Understand that You Have No Clue
Here it is Monday the 4th. A weekend that definitely held keys, turning points, surprises and culminations.
I am thankful for those that showed interest, sought to help and support me and those that did nothing at all concerning the anniversary of my wife's death.
It is understandable that people were concerned that I would be emotional and feeling things. That is what they do. For myself I was fine. It was a time for me to remember the good times and understand what the deal is right now. And that is what I did.
Friday was the departure of Monroe from the cigar shop so that held some significance. It was a bartender leaving Cheers.
Saturday was the changes in things with lil red, little one and the flower child. Things were said and I made my decisions as usual. I know the obvious results and reasons for the external things now. The differences between relationship, relation, dynamic and D/s relation were defined fully.
Yesterday was the day of drinking and more drinking and some eating. Oh and counseling and consoling on top of that. lol
Rick, Rich and Myra said I didn't need to be home yesterday because of the anniversary. But as I explained I was fine. But, they insisted. And I decided to go and try Rick's favorite restaraunt RX. The shrimp and grits were good. Which is rather shocking. Most of the time it isn't good. But it was very well balanced. So just like Rick has always bragged it was good. That and my bourbon and ginger beer drink and whatever else was in it was really good. So from there we head to Rick and his wife's house for more drinks and cigars and music out on the balcony.
But the day didn't stop there. Rich and I headed to Myra's for more drinking and smoking. And here is where they felt that I should be crying with them about things. Rich losing his wife and everything. Myra and everything that has been going on with her. I had no need to cry or be sad or anything else. So I merely talked to them and supported them as I kept drinking and smoking.
So, people may think that I was feeling this or that. Or holding things in. I am fine. I have been fine for a long time. I am proud and happy to have met, married, loved and been loved by a woman. lol she spoiled me into the idea that women like her were out there. With her stankin ass!! lol
There will be some more things said and some poetry expressed here and in other places. But I am going to drink this drink and eat some lunch.
until then.
Just be You!
I am thankful for those that showed interest, sought to help and support me and those that did nothing at all concerning the anniversary of my wife's death.
It is understandable that people were concerned that I would be emotional and feeling things. That is what they do. For myself I was fine. It was a time for me to remember the good times and understand what the deal is right now. And that is what I did.
Friday was the departure of Monroe from the cigar shop so that held some significance. It was a bartender leaving Cheers.
Saturday was the changes in things with lil red, little one and the flower child. Things were said and I made my decisions as usual. I know the obvious results and reasons for the external things now. The differences between relationship, relation, dynamic and D/s relation were defined fully.
Yesterday was the day of drinking and more drinking and some eating. Oh and counseling and consoling on top of that. lol
Rick, Rich and Myra said I didn't need to be home yesterday because of the anniversary. But as I explained I was fine. But, they insisted. And I decided to go and try Rick's favorite restaraunt RX. The shrimp and grits were good. Which is rather shocking. Most of the time it isn't good. But it was very well balanced. So just like Rick has always bragged it was good. That and my bourbon and ginger beer drink and whatever else was in it was really good. So from there we head to Rick and his wife's house for more drinks and cigars and music out on the balcony.
But the day didn't stop there. Rich and I headed to Myra's for more drinking and smoking. And here is where they felt that I should be crying with them about things. Rich losing his wife and everything. Myra and everything that has been going on with her. I had no need to cry or be sad or anything else. So I merely talked to them and supported them as I kept drinking and smoking.
So, people may think that I was feeling this or that. Or holding things in. I am fine. I have been fine for a long time. I am proud and happy to have met, married, loved and been loved by a woman. lol she spoiled me into the idea that women like her were out there. With her stankin ass!! lol
There will be some more things said and some poetry expressed here and in other places. But I am going to drink this drink and eat some lunch.
until then.
Just be You!
Sunday, April 03, 2016
The Bell Tolls in Memory of My Chocolate Doll
It was about this time on this night five years ago I was trying to revive my wife there on the floor next to our bed in our apartment. The time where the paramedics worked on her for an hour.
I sat in the living room stunned and quiet. So deep in shock that I looked at myself from the outside and the inside at the same time. Observing.
I can still laugh to this day about how she died. In the only way fitted for the one with the name Superwoman. She had two massive orgasms which caused her to die. Going and cumming at the same time. That was the way of my wife. The oxymoron.
There were some rough, crushing days of tears, pain and disbelief.
After a day of work, ice cream, burgers and fries and great dick riding sex. Never would have thought my wife would end up dead.
I am not crying right now. I miss when things made sense. When I had that miraculous solution to everything in life and nothing could change that.
I had waited and found the answer after a long battle and struggle. And to have it taken from me in a mere slow motion moment. Yeah, rather devastating.
And the aftermath! I was ruined for eternity with such a good thing apparently. I use to seek that same powerful woman to be with. Then I realized the reality.
Lightning had already struck. My miracle used up.
But hey Chocolate Doll. As you play guardian angel and haunting diety at times. Just as you told me. I wouldn't take back a moment of time spent with you. All the things that showed womanhood, marriage, love and relationship were more than possibilities.
I miss you baby. and I always will
My Chocolate Doll
I sat in the living room stunned and quiet. So deep in shock that I looked at myself from the outside and the inside at the same time. Observing.
I can still laugh to this day about how she died. In the only way fitted for the one with the name Superwoman. She had two massive orgasms which caused her to die. Going and cumming at the same time. That was the way of my wife. The oxymoron.
There were some rough, crushing days of tears, pain and disbelief.
After a day of work, ice cream, burgers and fries and great dick riding sex. Never would have thought my wife would end up dead.
I am not crying right now. I miss when things made sense. When I had that miraculous solution to everything in life and nothing could change that.
I had waited and found the answer after a long battle and struggle. And to have it taken from me in a mere slow motion moment. Yeah, rather devastating.
And the aftermath! I was ruined for eternity with such a good thing apparently. I use to seek that same powerful woman to be with. Then I realized the reality.
Lightning had already struck. My miracle used up.
But hey Chocolate Doll. As you play guardian angel and haunting diety at times. Just as you told me. I wouldn't take back a moment of time spent with you. All the things that showed womanhood, marriage, love and relationship were more than possibilities.
I miss you baby. and I always will
My Chocolate Doll
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