It has been a rough ride this week.
Gone from so called masters to dealing with attitudes, moods, jealous and all.
Add to that a female that turned out to be flaky and someone that I can't trust. I mean damn if you are having issues and something is going on then say that. I don't know why females have issues doing that. But don't waste my time because you are fucked up.
Time is pushing along at increased speed it seems.
Relationships and dynamics have been taxing. You have to choose to fight for them, do nothing or let them go. You can't make others involved choose to fight for it or even be important to them anyway. But that taxing weeds out whether it means something to me or not. I will drop individuals like penny stocks on wallstreet without hesitation. Other times I ride until they decide that they can't take it. And a select time it is a forever ride situation. Fucking choices are up to them to make.
Still in disbelief how hot it has been here and when I went to cali it was cooler there. I remember the brief time I lived out there how hot it was.
Interesting getting to know you times indeed. Very interesting.
Miss the girls. I might see before the end of the year maybe. But that is life.
Still on my quest to get things done and go. But not as bad as it is going to be next year. I still have to find someone to do jamaica with me in november. And still do the other trips that I have planned. Plus make some community events as well. Will have to coordinate these things with one of the girls going at some point. But next year will be really busy in the travel department and I am looking forward to it.
The fortress has grown and been fortified further. Weapons of mass annihilation are in effect. The cold void stands guard over the burning tenderness. As I laugh at what once was, reduced to an ember all because of choices they have made.
Enjoy your weekend. And stop hiding behind your defenses and getting your way and fucking LIVE!!
Saturday, July 29, 2017
Thursday, July 27, 2017
Life Unscripted: Body and Soul
This is going to be a long one I am sure so get your drinks, popcorn, blanket and whatever you need. This ride will be interesting indeed.
So the past two weekends I attended kinky events. They were mostly focused on play but within that came some serious soul and thought stirring activities.
Two weekends ago I went to the baltimore playhouse. It still amazes me that I was recognized and the service, introduction and all that were provided by submissives and slaves. It was truly outstanding. Add to that the whipped cream icing and whipped cream on top of being in the room afterwards with folks as Sir Mythos did an erotic hypnosis scene and our conversations and yeah We Did That!
But the bmore adventure and this last weekend's Sir Strange's kinky bbq wasn't about play. It was about being around each other and just enjoying, learning and fellowship. And it also was about service from submissive and slaves that was seen, experienced and evident. The energy and everything was dynamic and very eye opening.
It really made me want to enjoy being with appropriate folk in the community. And that is what I have decided to do and the next thing I will be attending is the CTX spanksgiving for sure. Because the knowledge that was dropped and the fellowship held some serious power. It definitely was a great part of D/s for me right now.
In the same token these two events shed light on service, submission and dynamics. I saw and was the recipient to some great examples of these. It made me take note and examine the service I require and need along with the proper service and aspects that should be in place. Definitely want and need a stronger and deeper service and dynamic. So there are decisions and work to do. Because My House needs to be in order a whole lot more. So that has been on the mind and in play lately. I may not require or ask for much but when I do then that service is what is expected. Because without the ability, desire to accomplish service then there is a breakdown in the relationship and dynamic. It also showed me that I can only accept the ability they have or don't have when it comes to service and submission or not at all. Either I accept they level even though it is not where I think it should be, work on it with them or let it all go.
I have been in this energy flow deep. Of course thinking and acting. Evaluations have been done, things and people have been placed accordingly and the tank is moving forward. The heart, soul and evil all have formed into basically a Gundam. *lol*
I will say this. I love and care about red and little one very deeply for many different reasons. Even though i piss them off and they can get annoyed at how I am about those things and show it. But yeah, I just don't give a fuck and show it anyway!
Well on to the issue that was had Sunday evening.
khrysalis and I decided to play for the first time. Hell, it was the first time we had ever met last weekend. To set up this i will say that she had a hard time with her release from her former master.
Ok, well we decided to do an impact scene. I was hoping she would let me use the kendo stick on her that I tried out on Saturday but dammit she wasn't down. lol So instead it was the tennis balls, flogger and dragon tail. The scene ramped up nicely. We are playing and I hear someone talking loudly about just cum. I am wondering why because we are the only ones playing in the dungeon even though Sir Bear's nubia was watching. I turn to make sure no one was in my way of my throw only to realize it was khrysalis' ex master. Now, I am pissed because it is obviously her fucking with khrysalis and I am irrate. It is dangerous, disrespectful and hazardous. I am trying to figure out how to bring her down without fucking her up at that point. At this point I realize that her crying has changed to sobbing. As I figure out a way to end the scene I am dealing with the anger, concern for her well being and everything. Finish the scene somehow and trying to give her aftercare and she cant' because she just is ready to get out of there and away from the ex. Sir Bear's nubia took her in the house for aftercare.
I couldn't and still can't believe that someone that has been in the lifestyle so long would be this petty, childish and fucked up over someone that has been released. To endanger them like that and disrespect a scene while claiming that she is doing energy play with someone else was really fucked up. And then the bad mouthing of khrysalis and crumb cake after that only added jp4 to the bonfire that was already raging. If you released people like I did then keep it moving and don't give a fuck. Instead of dragging shit on and on and making a mess.
I am still processing the whole thing and glad that khrysalis is alright.
Combined with the things that have gone on with red and little one. The new things and people being experienced. Things have been very adventurous lately. It will be interesting to see what happens with the new situations. And pebbles is moving right along. The Road Warriors will be getting back together in november at least and maybe sooner than that.
Enjoy your adventure to the fullest. Let go of the fears, walls and defenses that you keep up and LIVE!!
So the past two weekends I attended kinky events. They were mostly focused on play but within that came some serious soul and thought stirring activities.
Two weekends ago I went to the baltimore playhouse. It still amazes me that I was recognized and the service, introduction and all that were provided by submissives and slaves. It was truly outstanding. Add to that the whipped cream icing and whipped cream on top of being in the room afterwards with folks as Sir Mythos did an erotic hypnosis scene and our conversations and yeah We Did That!
But the bmore adventure and this last weekend's Sir Strange's kinky bbq wasn't about play. It was about being around each other and just enjoying, learning and fellowship. And it also was about service from submissive and slaves that was seen, experienced and evident. The energy and everything was dynamic and very eye opening.
It really made me want to enjoy being with appropriate folk in the community. And that is what I have decided to do and the next thing I will be attending is the CTX spanksgiving for sure. Because the knowledge that was dropped and the fellowship held some serious power. It definitely was a great part of D/s for me right now.
In the same token these two events shed light on service, submission and dynamics. I saw and was the recipient to some great examples of these. It made me take note and examine the service I require and need along with the proper service and aspects that should be in place. Definitely want and need a stronger and deeper service and dynamic. So there are decisions and work to do. Because My House needs to be in order a whole lot more. So that has been on the mind and in play lately. I may not require or ask for much but when I do then that service is what is expected. Because without the ability, desire to accomplish service then there is a breakdown in the relationship and dynamic. It also showed me that I can only accept the ability they have or don't have when it comes to service and submission or not at all. Either I accept they level even though it is not where I think it should be, work on it with them or let it all go.
I have been in this energy flow deep. Of course thinking and acting. Evaluations have been done, things and people have been placed accordingly and the tank is moving forward. The heart, soul and evil all have formed into basically a Gundam. *lol*
I will say this. I love and care about red and little one very deeply for many different reasons. Even though i piss them off and they can get annoyed at how I am about those things and show it. But yeah, I just don't give a fuck and show it anyway!
Well on to the issue that was had Sunday evening.
khrysalis and I decided to play for the first time. Hell, it was the first time we had ever met last weekend. To set up this i will say that she had a hard time with her release from her former master.
Ok, well we decided to do an impact scene. I was hoping she would let me use the kendo stick on her that I tried out on Saturday but dammit she wasn't down. lol So instead it was the tennis balls, flogger and dragon tail. The scene ramped up nicely. We are playing and I hear someone talking loudly about just cum. I am wondering why because we are the only ones playing in the dungeon even though Sir Bear's nubia was watching. I turn to make sure no one was in my way of my throw only to realize it was khrysalis' ex master. Now, I am pissed because it is obviously her fucking with khrysalis and I am irrate. It is dangerous, disrespectful and hazardous. I am trying to figure out how to bring her down without fucking her up at that point. At this point I realize that her crying has changed to sobbing. As I figure out a way to end the scene I am dealing with the anger, concern for her well being and everything. Finish the scene somehow and trying to give her aftercare and she cant' because she just is ready to get out of there and away from the ex. Sir Bear's nubia took her in the house for aftercare.
I couldn't and still can't believe that someone that has been in the lifestyle so long would be this petty, childish and fucked up over someone that has been released. To endanger them like that and disrespect a scene while claiming that she is doing energy play with someone else was really fucked up. And then the bad mouthing of khrysalis and crumb cake after that only added jp4 to the bonfire that was already raging. If you released people like I did then keep it moving and don't give a fuck. Instead of dragging shit on and on and making a mess.
I am still processing the whole thing and glad that khrysalis is alright.
Combined with the things that have gone on with red and little one. The new things and people being experienced. Things have been very adventurous lately. It will be interesting to see what happens with the new situations. And pebbles is moving right along. The Road Warriors will be getting back together in november at least and maybe sooner than that.
Enjoy your adventure to the fullest. Let go of the fears, walls and defenses that you keep up and LIVE!!
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