Friday, April 15, 2016

I am the DISCLAIMER

So this will not be politically correct at all.

I am a man.
I am a Dominant.

I date. Doesn't mean I date everyone. And doesn't mean I fuck any pussy. Those that know me and have been with me will tell you how extra picky I am.

I am and believe in love and marriage. I have been happily married and would marry again if another miracle woman showed up.

I am loving and caring or you are just part of the environment when it comes to me.

Yes, I am emotionless currently unless it involves one individual for the most part.

With me you get what you give and according to your staion in my world.

There is only one person that knows me enough and is authorized to tell me about me. So if you attempt to act like you are Ru then I will resoond accordingly.

Statuses with go like this:

  • The inner sanctum
  • Inner circle
  • Outer circle
  • Humans
I am direct and I move quickly with purpose and understanding. 

I think constantly. Analysis and evaluations occur every second.

So...

I love, care and like to fuck and play. Or I just don't give a fuck and you don't ean a damn thing to me.

Your choice

Either way, I am real damn good!


Thursday, April 14, 2016

Defining Moments

I was talking to Cutie Pie last night and we were candid as usual since we have been talking. She asked me what type of Dominant am I? And I know the answers are varying for others from daddy dom and all the other labels.

I answered. I am just a Dominant. I have done well in striving to promote, encourage and grow my submissives. Providing structure, protocols, outlet and ability to focus on attainable changes and goals.

Looking back it is a far place from where I tried to start with lil red. The difficulties and things that wouldn't come together. With little one and the flower child it opened up other experiences. Gave way to applying who and what I am  exponentially.  And the things that I have gained and learned from those with lasting dynamics as well as my continue learning has developed into something for sure now. And I am thankful for that.

I had to realize that their submission is only capable of what they mentally can handle, will give and choose to be. Absolutely nothing more. So, I don't try to make them submissive. They have to already choose to be that to me. Some know their journey in that and others don't. lil red has her type of submission that she is still trying to define and tie in with me. little one works on her submission in conjunction with her poly lifestyle. And flower child works to learn a new understanding and role in her submission from what it use to be.

This is not originally what I wanted or looked for. I wanted just one submissive that could handle things and be the woman that I needed to be with and serve me. That started out with lil red. And due to circumstances just wasn't an interested position for her. So when she kept talking about little one and flower child interested at the time I was just like whatever. And then I decided to prove her right. I was wrong and not even interested in them in anything. But I decided to gain knowledge and learning from them. It led eventually from no interest at all to submissive undertakings.

lil red asked if I was happy. No, I am not. When I get a chance to enjoy a moment with her I will be in that moment. I will ride that happiness until we see each other annually.  Happiness has become like a Halo construct. It is appreciate and taken instride when it is available. My happiness will be found shortly when I am back to my travel and time spent away with those that want to see me and places I will enjoy freely.  Until those moments and the recipient of the journey join. I am merely the practical machine.

Cutie Pie and I discussed poly and relationships. Their meaning and applications.

Poly works one of two ways. It has all individuals involved fully and committed to the established relationship or it is a business like relationship decision of what is best possible joint venture. There are other variables like emotional attachment and love. In my case there has been some emotional attachment. But I also learned that with lil red there has to be limited to extremely little emotional attachment involved to allow her to be comfortable and interested. I wasn't use to turning the emotional attachment switch off when I was interested in someone unless they were never to be encountered again. For her it allowed her to be a step comfortable after all these years. little one and flower child need the aspect of emotional attachment to feel a more whole form of connection. And flower child I have been the life guard in her journey into exploring and understanding her emotional ability, skill and the need not to fear it.

Relationships are extremely tailored made. With little one and flower child I am always in contact with. We are engaged and I make sure things are running as smoothly as possible with health, life career and interests. lil red and I dont' do those things. She has had to decide to develop things herself first and foremost. lil red is not mentally connected like that. A work in progress or maybe something that will never be. Her time will show it in the end.

So when Cutie Pie and I were talking about the relationship I wanted for myself. I simply replied honestly.

I started out and sought one woman to be the all I needed. And it was possible and attainable. I choose lil red since she was the correct choice for that. But, the one thing I can't factor in is her wanting, seeing or being that to me.

Maybe only my wife was the only woman to be able to fulfill that role. But I know better. What I saw was simply the formula for success and an extraordinary thing. But I cannot make anyone feel, see, understand or accept anything.

So instead I have a poly relation where the females do their thing. My involvement is on a sliding scale accordingly.  And it's position is definitely interesting. I am not out fucking everything like it is thought and believed. This wasn't about pussy. And yes it is not what I wanted and needed from the start. But I made the executive decision and adapted to this moment in time only.

Who knows. The three of them may be gone and unable to be with me. And I am not pissed and upset about that. As long as they didn't violate those sacred rules I have they are fine. I just want them to be better females, submissives and individuals than whenever we started. To have their experiences from interacting with me and move forward appropriately.

This may all blow up this summer and I will be the new Dominant that had the females with over decades of experience each no more. But, I will take it in stride. As I have already looked at the possibilities and realities in play and in mind.


So with all that said

Talking to Cutie Pie was fun as always. And I hope it allowed her to understand more and get closer. She is an interesting and unique type. Plus us newbies need to stick together right! lol

My positions on love, relations, relationships and D/s dynamics have all taken a drastic MasterChief type of restructuring. It has been an impact on the girls. There has been some unpleasantness and I think that some hasn't caught on to them yet.

But the MasterChief application of me is present. The cold, calculating man of action. Even though their words claimed they didn't want it this way. It is the only way that responses and achievement has been attained.

But hey the nice side is available for the right applicant!
lol Cutie Pie thanks again as always. The interactions are always interesting.

Poetic Moment: OUr Scorecard Reviewed

Our Scorecard Reviewed



Emotionless
I present to you
What wants and comforts you
The shell of design
The empty heart and mind

It is what you asked of me
What comforts you

Pristine disconnects
Engraved in what is best
Well, what is seen as best

As feelings remain at rest
Intimacy left only to
Superficial and momentary
Temporal effects

Neurons no longer connect
Long term memory
The only thing that remembers

Resemblences of times
Of intwined
Me and you

Then I squint my eyes
Wondering if there ever truly was
An emotional meeting
A feeling that was more than

Good times
Fucking and fleeting

Damn
Will I even remember you

You chose
I agreed with those
Counter balanced relation cues

The moment the music stopped
The heart turned cold
Love went from
Red hot to black and blue

Revealed
Relationship
Played out like an
Episode of Doom




From the chocolatezeus collection  4/14/16  ©

Poetry: Unclaimed Baggage

Unclaimed Baggage




In fleeting moments
You remember me
Claim I am the man you
Love and are dating

As we look into the
Distorted circus house of mirrors
Head turned to the side

Revealing
The disenfranchised
Relation that we are living

With limited access
Brokered feelings and affect

Seems like the delivery
The bond broken

Collapsed in your labyrinth
Is where we seem to be

Denizens of the fallacy
As we dance the clown dance
Of this balsa wood type
Relationship insanity


I agreed
So I am also at fault
In this thing

No emotions
No feeling
Just the

Emotionless
Lustful snippets
Of this prorated
Union

Passports collected
As TSA recheck
Fails to reveal
As we fight the

Feelings
Want and ideals

Unopen
Unwanted

We are left
Spinning around the
Carousel




From the chocolatezeus collection  4/14/16  ©

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Sometimes...

There are a few times I wish I had a woman to spend time with. Then I realize the truth and have to amend that to...I wish for a few times of interest and time spent a year at least.

But it is all good. Quality once in a blue moon is alright. Just time to adjust back even further to balance it all out.

lil red asked if I was happy. No, I am not. I am fine. I have returned to the armored Titan that I should have been instead of allowing feelings and emotions.

They are all comfortable in their places and happy and growing in whatever way they are looking at. I am glad for them. They are in places they weren't when they met me so they have plenty to feel good and happy about.

The Nemesis Enforcer has now been fully relinquished after this talk tonight.

Just the application of Doomsday Apocalypse meets Darkseid remains.

Such glorious things. Such glorious things.

Spec Ops time! Well, if you didn't realize it had already started. There is nothing else I can say.


*snicker*

Poetry of the Moment: Out of Time

Out of Time



I already know
Even though you say
You are mine

That it is merely
A spec of sand in the
Hourglass of time

As time is your
Alpha and omega
And you it’s pi and prime

I understand that
We are merely renting
Within only these moments in time

No future defined
Nothing to predetermine
Our currency
Is the current situation

Our relationship
Unparalleled algorithm
Disjointed and disfigured
Until absolution

Time
The ultimate winner

I hear the chants for a miracle
One of them is even mine
Then I sit back and recline

Just making the most
And the best
Out of this borrowed time

You and I
Integrated currently in our timeline
Until the time cop appears
And says

Out of time



From the chocolatezeus collection  4/12/16  ©

Time is a Flying

I talked to my Ru Ru. Back from her birthday celebration at the aries bash in atlanta. So, yes I got to enjoy her patented adventures. It is what I live for these days and like always. lol

So yeah the fucktastic adventures of life unscripted were revealed to me once again. And I enjoyed every minute of it. Of course I got the usual "I want to enjoy some adventures too" speech from her. But hey what can I say? My life is boring. All I had to tell her about was the dating mess and the stuff that the sister has said out the blue lately.

Gamma energy went off the charts a bit ago. So, yeah I am there in full ABM.

When people look and see my lack of interest, desire and all that. They feel some kind of way. But it's ok. It is merely adaptoid technology. When you are in the right place then it will adapt to what you bring to the table.

But anyway I had to realize when Ru was talking about she will be 40 next year. I was like damn, I have known her that damn long. The last major birthday I had with her was her epic 30th birthday. That right there was off the chain. One to add to the ultra history books of the Road Warriors: Life Unscripted adventure. So, I told her that I am celebrating with her no matter what. Even it means hanging out after and before her fuckfestival activities.  She said that it wasn't going to be like that. But I know better. Between her and red I know the fucktastic chicks personally.  Either way and epic 40th birthday for her will be made. And maybe this time I will find someone to roll with me and I get a chance to enjoy as well. *yeah right! gtfoh* No females are going to go be with me and be my play thing. oh well. I will be entertained.

I had them chuckling at the shop when I said that the girls said that I should get a girlfriend so they are not overwhelmed, thrown off and don't have to get even more emotionally protective. What can I say? I am a difficult, evil, motherfucking asshole.

Who knows. Maybe the whole project needs to be scrapped and I just say fuck it all!


Enjoy your tuesday. I am already drinking and ahead of you. So catch up or fall back. The choice is yours! Even though I pretty much know what you are going to do anyway. lol

Sunday, April 10, 2016

Singing Good Times, Good Times

Singing Good Times, Good Times




Laughter rings like church bells
Hearty laughs and silliness
Prevails

Discussions with Big T
About twin monkey bitch activities
Or the white guy belting out Motown tunes
And skinny dipping depravity
Mixed in with electric bull riding stuck in the corner
Absurdity

Rolling with Big Donnie
Stand up comedy routines
White woman with a lit cigarette, oxygen tank and drink
The original type of comedy

And what can I say
The episodes with my
Ru Ru
Are still cream of the crop things

Making the porn star man see
Blue moons, pink elephants and black stars
The bbw stripper
With the fake eyelash in the middle of her forehead
Then the guys she has fucked to sleep
Yeah Life Unscripted is just
PRICELESS

Can go on and on
But there are too many for
This damn poem

So laugh with me
Or laugh at it
Either the shit is still funny
Forever and on




From the chocolatezeus collection   4/10/16  ©

Coffee...No Filter

lol, yes this was inspired because I didn't put the filter in the coffee machine when I made the coffee. It fits this weeks recap.

My best friend, fellow Road Warrior and the constant in my life had her birthday Friday. Of course she is doing it Life Unscripted style and partying at the aries bash in Atlanta. Can't wait to hear about the adventures since I live through her. (she says it is unfair and my adventures are more than hers. Bullshit. lol) But damn, next year she will be 40. I can't believe it has been this long since that infamous 30th party. Whew! So next year we are going to have to do something that befits her. Well, I won't be at her fuckfest aspect of it unless I can go watch. But I plan on being there to help her celebrate.

Snoop and Doug E Fresh were here for our annual azalea festival. Everyone kept thinking there was going to be fighting and everything because Snoop is a rapper and everything. But as I told everyone he is from an older generation. My generation who have to work and handle responsibilities. I guess they thought I didn't want to go see him because of the possibility of gangs and violence. Nope, I just didn't want to be around that crowd down there in downtown. And sure enough the sheriff that was down there verified the same thing when the cigar shop owner asked him about the concert. I had to chuckle.

A discussion occurred about me finding a girlfriend. I ctfu of course. Hell, I tried that and it has been the ultimate in non fiction looking like fiction, kind of disaster. There just is not anyone out there that can handle, fit the bill or is available. I am ok with that. And I had to laugh even more to think that was even possible.

In a discussion about marriage and being married. I had to laugh again (apparently a theme this weekend and week).  I know most people have had bad marriages and rough ones. Divorces and separations and just the general attitude and actions of females will leave a real nasty taste in your mouth. But,, when I was asked if I would ever want to get married again. The shock was evident when I said yes. I loved marriage. But I am also a realist. I had a miracle then. And like lightning, the probability of it striking twice is near non existent. I never was bitter about marriage. Whether because of mine or the ones I have seen and experienced others having. I did it my way, like the song says and it was good.

Which brings me to a subject that has come up consistently in the week from people. The subject of "settling."  And, this subject is in the connotation of relationships with females.

I make decisions based on my pros, cons, evaluations and analysis. I am a realist. And even though I know what ultimately I would want and need. I also work in the realm of reality and adjust accordingly. Adapt, Overcome and Annihilate!!!  I can see why the concept of settling has come to their minds. Because I stated what I wanted. The marriage, the type of relation and where it was going. See, the thing is that that is all mine. In dealing with a human that doesn't mean they want, know or even feel anything like that.  And at that point I choose what I want to do. What benefits to nothing ratio is in play there. Are there any possibilities? Is it worth anything? Or should I excommunicate and just stick to my Build A Bitch program?  In the beginning I was gung ho about what I needed. Every aspect. I wanted what I had previously in a different woman with a different experience. And somewhere buried underneath 5 vaults it remains. But the thinking and analytical mean remains. And understands the gravity of the situation of life. And therefore adaptation and situational awareness along with tactical thinking will remain the life blood of my existence.

The subject of being a Dominant.

Everyone thinks it's easy. It's about fucking and replacing pussy and bitches. It really isn't. It is about helping, supporting and leading growth, better living and achievements for your submissives. And you best believe it is not a cake walk. You have subs that want to grow. You have subs that you have to enter the labyrinth of the Minotaur to get them to open up. Subs that fight you to be submissive to you even though they want to fully.  It is not all bad and negative either. They are plenty of times I am happy of and with them. Times when I am proud of them of their achievements and accomplishments.

Oh, and that whole it's all one dick and a bunch of pussy thought? Yeah well they all have someone and or someone else's so yeah I dont' get that either. I am just doing my job.

So that fame, glitter and ticker tape parade. It is not the thing. It is not even relevant to this position or lifestyle. On my side of the slash I think and maintain the outlook and responsibilities. Even against their push back, denial and stubbornness.

I just remain...

Other than that. I am looking forward to making some plans to leave the country and celebrate my birthday this year. So, if you have some ideas and recommendations then let me know. I got my eye on Amsterdam since lil red had all the fun last year. I am thinking about doing that. But I also know Jamaica and the Dominican republic is calling me.  Either way, I am finding a trip or hopefully two out of here. The air force brat bug is screaming. Plus, getting back on the road again soon. It is time to make moves, move on and disappear.

Well, there goes the comedy, the reality and this thing called Life Unscripted. All straight, dark, strong coffee. No filter and no cream. I am too sweet not to have sugar though as I beat you with some bamboo. *evil laughter*





Our Contorted Meaning



I hold you closely
Even when you

Can’t understand and see
You feel nothing
You buck against me

I don’t have every answer
No Professor X precognition

Yet, I hold reverence
In what we have chosen together

I look past
The apathetic, ambivalence
The emotional and mental defiance

I see the results
The attainment that can be
The culmination that we seek

No blueprint
No crystal ball

Simply
Will and determination
Dedication

The desire for us
This relationship

I will simply continue
To just
Be



From the chocolatezeus collection   4/10/16  ©