The Last Stand for a Sin Eater

In my yin and yang existence I have given, shown and been some hardcore love, affection and passion. I will protect, stand side by side and go to war without a second thought. I am the father of the devil and act accordingly.

But I can't and won't fight against those that I love and care about. I cannot make them see, understand or accept things that are against.

This has come in the form of just being there for a chick. Available to talk and listen. To let me into their life and to stay there. That intimate connection that I like and enjoy.  But in this day and age there has been an advance decree on making sure to keep distance no matter what for the proper escape clause and minimal investment clauses. Because their past delegates their future and fear of vulnerability leaves them barren.

The destructive and caustic weight of society has created females that hate themselves for not being some unrealistic representation of what the nazis have decided is what should be. So when I am attracted to them and show them that I get negative and or dismissive comments from them. what is the point? A man is supposed to fight you and re program you to be with you? Yeah, that is asinine. Even after you have been with them the whole personal defamation of character is retained.

So as a man I remain behind the eight ball because females have chosen to be in this unattainable situation. Make the environment safe as possible and with as much support as possible. Only for any implied, overt or thoughts of fraction that occurs being a major assault against them. I say nay to thee!


Just stuff that came out with everything going on and interactions with  folk lately.

Slipping into Darkness

After smoking a bowl of whisky tobacco and still drinking I figured I better get some stuff done and out.

As the universe turns is definitely in full swing.  Things are picking up and I am glad. It is time to leave everything in the dust and as the song says 'walk on by.'

Two weekends from now it is off to tennesee and to my god daughters graduation. Which seems to become more of a clusterfuck each day. I am getting bits and pieces slowly. Now I find out she was pregnant a month ago and got an abortion. Add to that the issues with her parents and this school thing and yeah this is one for the books lol

There were some that were concerned about me since it is mothers day. But I am fine. Just some thoughts and feelings about Chocolate Doll. I have no kids and considering how females, society and children are these days that is a true blessing indeed.

More and more paperwork. More attorney things to do. And the gubberment is turning some new screws.

The silver lining is still growing and I can't wait to see it get added to things and make things better.

I look at my calendar and the time and see how much has passed.  I guess I thought something would change and I have given a chance all this time. Just time to nail that compartment shut as I figured would happen and say oh well fuck it at least got the bits in the past.