Yes, I can admit I get tunnel vision about some things. I don't notice them at all at times. So with that said...here we go.
I am giving, mean, loving, caring, apathetic and completely unusual. My inner circle is like being the Illuminati to me. When I accept your application and allow you in the trumpets blare and the festivities are of royalty. The outside of that I may acknowledge your existence depending on the moment of the day and what is going on with me.
I thrive on that love, affection, support and vibe that I share to those that are close to me. I will never deny or downplay that. My words and my actions should convey that. Sometimes more effectively than others. I have never seen this as a negative aspect or weakness. It has always been strength and fortitude. And I have seen the point HQ made about maybe missing opportunities. But that is outweighed by the diamonds that are more prevalent through all that being picky.
I am the yin and yang of the dark and the light all rolled up into one being. The past has groomed me to be stronger and more stoic. While the future still holds hope for me. I still see it in it's bitter reality. So, I can be a romantic or the evil one with the booming voice for no reason.
By no means will I ever say I am easy to deal with all the time. After all I am a captain caveman, club carrying chauvinist in true form. But I will love you intensely, care for and about you as well as be there with you as much as possible.
I know what I want and even who I want it with. The problem is always that I am not the only one in the equation. So I ride the waves of life to see where they will lead to.
Coming off eye opening revelations, smiles and feeling great. I ponder on the next thing. The movement into more of me.
I have embraced my sadistic and unique ways. From the super horny, greedy fuck you to death happily and try to kill me with orgasms me. To the give me all the pain that you seek and can keep so that I can make you my Pain Masterpiece. And allowing more and more of my Beast Mode out has been intoxicating. I am glad I did it in steps and have been able to let more of it loose. The ultimate beast mode still spars some concern for me but I lick my lips in anticipating it's delicious release. So many skills have to be worked on to reach the peak.
As Ru Ru and I have said to each other. Our sex drives are super crazy. We are not in the best of shape but fucking, sucking and everything for ours is like automatic with us. If I am feeling you and enjoying us fucking. I will gladly fuck you for days, weeks and eternity. They said us old men shouldn't want sex anymore. that at 20 we have reached our peak and fall there after rapidly. Then why does it seem that my need and desire is increasing? It leaves me with that sexual heightened energy. In a frenzy. And I recognize the recipient may not be taking it the way I am. *lol* But it be calling me!
So I am working on the relationships that I want and intend to keep. The ones that are not cutting it will be released. The ones I want I am sinking more energy, passion and everything into them. I guess those recipients better get ready for more intensity.
This months adventure was a blessing. One that I am still basking in and thankful for. Showing me what can be. The vibe and connection that is awe inspiring.
The life of Zeus. Full adventure and notoriety.
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