I don't claim total knowledge and experience. But I do know what I have learned and want.
Yet females like this fake domme tell me I am submissive to her because I asked her a question. Or the so called switch chick that I couldn't trust not to lie to herself. Trying to instruct and tell me to do things or trying to get their way. I merely laugh at their asses. They are funny to me. Even in my vanilla life I didn't allow that to happen. So what makes you think that you can try that since I have embraced myself completely? Both light and dark mingled and strengthened!
Revelations and understanding have been the theme this year without a doubt. Especially in this lifestyle and all relations. From slaves and subs that are supposedly trained in the traditional ways but actions and words convey the opposite in every way. All the lying and pretending. The use of the words love and family when they have no idea of the concept at all.
The unbridled desire transmuted into a reality check. That regardless of my gung ho attitude and need in this lifestyle. I have to force march through because I am dealing with humans in this equation. That desire to have a poly family. Hell to even have a sub and slave. Gave way to the reality that finding one is just like all relationships. A pure miracle that you are seeking.
I realize that I need this. That it is a part of me. One that has not been fed at all until recently. And I don't want to go forward without that part fulfilled. Yet, I want it filled permanently instead of putting together a bunch of temps. Yet, that may be the only way to be since the mental stability seems to be fleeting now in society.
So I will merely continue the vetting and interviewing with hopes of something. But not holding my breath for anything.
BDSM like everything concerning individuals is a miracle needle in a haystack kind of thing.
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