Musings and Mahogany Delight

Some interesting developments since the last time. Came across unknown info online as usual. Laughed, took it in and added it to the rest of the list of everything. Laughter, the beach, Chicago and food and drink have stayed the course though and gave life to the current times.

Ok Giordano's is still the bomb and I see that I still love some Harold's chicken. lol After seeing a slave get some Luo Malnati's pizzas in the mail I am mad I didn't think of stopping by there dammit. Miss Dusty's since it was closed but the few hours were worthwhile.  And I had me original motherfucker at the hotel on lakeshore again. And they were delicious just like the first time dammit.

I tried to get tickets to do the damn African American museum and once again a damn bust. I can't even get some for June for my birthday. Fuck it! I am tired of trying to go there. I wonder what fucking morons put together this damn system. So I am crossing that museum off the list. I will stick to my museum and probably finally make it to the Spy museum.

The writing has been hitting home lately. And the book work and organization is getting done.  But there is still a lot more to do.

Adrienne's anniversary of her death is next week so I have to prepare. I am sure that will be a day that I don't need to be bothered with those that are not with me or have some ignorant ass shit to say. So the fortress of solitude it is and maybe a call to the one person that can be trusted fully. This whole year is a anniversary and testament to the good old days and to my dedication to quality.

So...

I ended up having a catching up conversation with mahogany delight. A fellow writer, poet and interest from back in the day. It has been years years since we talked and got together. She was always the eclectic, feminist with plenty of attitude. She had some good pussy too. But it was funny to hear that she has a damn 11 year old daughter though.

So the conversation came to her 11 year relationship that apparently just ended. Her ex apparently told her that she wasn't spending enough time with him and apparently has been dating someone else for a while. She works for a council check in dc, has to take care of her child and needs to hang out with her friends. Her comment was that she thought that males didn't want a female that they needed to be around but once in a while. I had a humongous laugh at that. But it is true. Females think these days that they can skate along and just kind of pick things up when they feel like it and someone will sit around waiting on them to get ready. Well. That is incorrect.  Nothing wrong with having your career, taking care of those that you love and doing things with your people. But if in your list of priorities who you are dating is not a priority at all then there is no need for you. And I know that from years of personal experience. She was shocked but she understood I was coming a place of reality check. A good way to catch up, help and be entertained.

Otherwise...

We have the countdown to the demon 6k episode and the god daughter graduation. This is going to be something for the books for sure. Life Unscripted will be other worldly at these points I am sure.

If you haven't tried it this Hibiki whiskey is Delicious! Get you some. Otherwise enjoy your weekend and you can hit me at the other spots for the other goodies lol

Poetry: Strangers

Strangers

Who are you?

Do I remember we?

Remind me why I am supposed to

Even remember

Wait

Something is coming back to me

Did we date?

Weren’t we supposed to be in a relationship?

Hmm, seems like a distant dream

Something made up in some off romance thing

I think love, desire and togetherness

Were part of that pipe dream

Oh wait

This is reality

That pipe dream

Shame on me for wanting to make things work even

Understood

Message received

My choice was made

The fulcrum broke on the opposite end

Even with my heart deeply invested from the start

You can’t fight another’s dead cold

heart

Back to reality

Back to life

Once soul mates

Laughing, adventurous intimates

Now strangers

Like we were nothing

At all

From the chocolatezeus collection   3/28/18  ©

This is Not the Yellow Brick Road: Dominance and Submission

Howdy

So between conversations, conferences and conference calls there has been a plethora of information exchange, observation and a whole lot more. lol

In my years of experience I have been able to observe and experience D/s in a multitude of ways.

From the fraudulent dominant, submissive and slave. Only there to usurp and control things that make them feel better. Unable to live the roles that they claim.

To those that are just lost and need a kick in the head to get them on the right path.

And those that are doing their thing to the best of their ability and they don't think that they infallible or know everything.


My Journey


In the submissive that I have had there has been a multitude of all kinds of things. From mistakes I made. To choosing the wrong ones. To holding onto things that were not going to work at all. All of these were my choices. There has been some success and plenty of learning for sure.

Learned that if they claim to be submissive or slave and they steady are trying to goad and change you then that is not what they are. If they are trying to mold you into someone else for their comfort then they are attempting to usurp the hierarchy all together.

Submission is a choice that they have to make for themselves. Not something that has to be ripped from or beaten out of them. It is their will and desire to follow your lead. To know that you will keep their best interest and well being at the forefront. And that is extremely real for me. I am going to keep their well being as one of the most important things. in the same token if they are not wanting to be a part of this then you have to cut your losses and let them go do their thing. It is their choice to submit willingly and do their role or not. If it is not then say thanks and take care.


Vetting, understanding and consideration are supremely important steps I found. Instead of just taking on some experiment to see another style of what was called a submissive. I needed to lay the gauntlet down and put them through it to validate their worth. Experience taught me that valuable lesson.

I have had some great service by those that have been under me as well as those that are not mine at all. And all have been appreciated. I love seeing, enjoying and being a part of what service from a slave and submissive is like when done properly.


One of the most important things though is the Alignment of Wills.  That need for my charges to understand, see and seek to achieve the goals that have been laid out for us. Goals that encompass employment, education, lifestyle, journey, adventures and more.  Without this there is nothing but backlash, attitude, dysfunction and Burger King mentalities.  Something I seriously wish I had fully understood and put completely into full effect at the beginning.

It isn't about commanding them to do my bidding. It is about the help, support and guidance that I bring. About helping with decisions, formulating plans, communicating needs and wants.  All to achieve goals that are set for my submissive. So yeah it is not all that selfish shit you had in your head , heard from the experts or saw on some fake bdsm thing. This is real life where we work on the betterment.


I am not at the end of my journey. I am still in the thick of it. Learning, growing and fixing things as I keep on moving. Building on my experiences and what I have learned has led me to be miles away from where I started. And I look forward to being miles away from where I am currently in the future.

Don't settle, be complacent or fraudulent about what role you want. Make it happen.

“Wars come and go, but my soldiers stay eternal.”

– 2pac

Poetic Moment: te desidero

the curve of your lips

the feel and taste of their deliciousness

I miss

your tantalizing chocolate

needing you to melt all over me

craving every ounce of your chocolate drop

I miss

your moans and groans

your arched back

creamy explosions

I miss

let me enjoy the look into your eyes again

to see the universe

shown brightly on that background of

eternity

I miss

our talks and laughter

in depth Prince discussions

music and tennis history

I miss

when there was an actual

you and me

when we wanted 

love, a relationship, a dynamic even

I miss

So I smile and ingest the memories

the adventures

places, things and milestones

that I still can keep

whatever has been chosen

I have no power over

displaced

I will just continue to

miss you

for eternity

from the chocolatezeus collection  3/26/18  (c)

Laughter, Music, Cartoons and the Enjoyment of it All

So, I hope you have been taking it easy and making the most of everything.

I have been enjoying conversation and interaction. qt and best have had me rolling and laughing. Just finished talking about tennis and the comedian lunell.

But yeah we have been on it about cartoons. Because that is one of my favorite things. From the old Thundarr the Barbarian to that old Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd opera skit. Just rolling and reminiscing.

I always end up with music buffs and experts so this has been no different. From shell toe Adidas to wondering why the hell heyonce and turtle tickets cost two house mortgages. But hey folks want to pay that to see the non singing hack and the turtle that is up to them.

It is funny how I always end up with folks that are down for the old school cartoons and music. But damn I love running into folks that I can actually talk to, laugh and interact with.

In other news still on alert for the moment things will change. Thankfully I don't have to worry about the invasion next week or in two weeks so far so that is good.

Counting down to seeing Black Violins next month finally. That is going to be great!

And damn this year is moving fast as hell. Already almost at the point where things will pick up more speed with everything that has to be done and handled.


I guess I will prepare for the week after this week. No comfort, no support and it is all good. ABM handle their own.



Well it is almost time to start another week so make it happen captain...

Ring, Ding, Dong...the Important Things Are Going On

It is about that time to hit some museums. Maybe I will finally get to the African American museum in the dmv without having to get a ticket 4 months in advance. But that is on deck along with the tank museum and my normal pilgrimage to the Air & Space museum. It is on!

Relations are moving right along. *busting full auto shots*

Mega change going down in the next two weeks.

About to see where I will touchdown this year.

Writings have been crazy and the work is getting done so that will be coming probably before the summer.

Just focusing on the important things and strengthening the important things.


So keep your head up and make the important things a priority.

Changing of the Guard

Things have been interesting and hectic along with a number of other things. Dealing with the health issues has been taxing and handling all the other stuff has weighed heavily. But this is what I do and have done since landing on this planet.

I have had a good time though with some new interactions. it is always fun to be able to talk about nerdy stuff, cartoons and the weird things that us black nerds are into. So that has been a breath of fresh air. Combined with these new recipes off of Facebook that I have been sharing and eating it is a nice exemption from the negative shit that is going on.

Preparing for the storm of destruction that will arrive in two weeks I guess. Not ready or feeling this at all.  But going to make it do what it do.

Closer to my god daughters graduation also. lol this is going to be one for the books for sure. Life Unscripted will be super crazy while I am there. 

I need to get my tattoo done before the summer hits as well so I need to go see Eddie and get that done. 

The cream is rising to the top. And the discarded is dwindling down. 


As I reach into my haversack and produce roles, positions and stations. I laugh, smile, feel some sadness and look at the reality of where this will all end this year. Actually sooner than the end of the year this time. 


With that I leave you with this thought


If it is of importance to you then you will show, manage, be vigilant and wanton about it. 

Poetic Moment: I Risked It All

I Risked It All

From before the moment we truly met

My desire for you licked the flames

In person the sun went nova

The journey began

I put behind my mistrust and skepticism

It was time to take a chance

For I saw a forever in those eyes

Lost in my captivation

The connection was better than a T1 line

I dove in without hesitation

After analyzing and reanalyzing everything

In my heart and mind

The reasoning I could no longer deny

Like a Shakespearean play

I professed it all

Laid at your feet every ounce of information

No pressure at all

Open

Vulnerable

Full disclosure

No pressure on you at all

Maybe that is where I fell

Or would fall

Regardless

The risk of having you

Was worth it all

From the chocolatezeus collection  3/17/18  ©

Poetic Tribute: In Love But Never Mind

In Love But Never Mind

Filled with excitement and happiness

So many episodes of you and me

Like tulips shining brightly

Tulip festival quality

Each moment together

Anticipated like winning the lottery

Adventures blossomed

More times together were fostered

Seeding each moment of deeper desire

For you and me

Your disbelief

Catalyst to show you just how much you mean to me

To make sure that you understand

This treasure that was available to you and me

I held onto it so tightly

Choking life so much that

It had no choice to feel and recognize me

Until the moment came

Where revelations were made

Reality fully explained

So I tipped my hat

Smiled and thanked for the opportunity

Bid my adieu to

You and me

So

Never mind

From the chocolatezeus collection  3/17/18  ©

Expectations and Negotiations

What do you expect...

• from people
• from relationships
• from dynamics

Why do you negotiate...

• from people
• from relationships
• from dynamics

These things hold the ebb and flow of things through out our existence and daily life. I see both expectations and negotiations prevalent in all things that we do that encounters another individual. 

The concept of expectation for me:

Well, I have to levels to this. There are the things that I expect myself to do in conjunction with others at their level, worth and station in my life. And there is the understanding that I expect everyone except one person to do what is in their best interest and only their best interest at all times. 

There will be plenty that see this as cynical and negative but that doesn't change the truth of the matter. When it comes down to their decisions they are only going to be concerned about themselves. Call it human nature or whatever you want. It is a constantly proven case unless they choose to have someone that they won't do that with. 

Negotiation and Me:

We negotiate everything with our interactions with people. From how much time they will get to if they can even talk to us at all. I can be subtle or overt. 

I tend to have pretty stiff negotiations because of those things that I stand on as my principles. But there have been deviations in that program. I have made the mistake of not negotiating a D/s dynamic and relationship but hindsight is a bitch. 

I feel that if I let you know my wants, desires, needs and interest then you have the information from which we can talk. And in talking about those things and the others stuff you negotiate whether you want to be bothered, if it is just something to do or if it has a deeper meaning than that.  And there we delve into if there will be communication, a relation, relationship or dynamic. 

Ahh the joys of discussion, education and experience.

How are your expectations and negotiations?

Psycho Therapy and Me

After a great read and discussion from someone I can understand there may be a point where I will see a professional before the end of this year. Especially because I am going to have to make a serious decision before the end of this year based on what is going on and has been going on or what may continue to go on from here on.

This discussion brought out the factors of truly breaking down the person that is the professional and making sure they are capable is highly important in even attempting the process.

Having heard the judgement of those that are therapists, counselors and psychologist has made me understand the pause and concern necessary. That along with their life experiences, feelings and all make them a liability mostly for me. Especially depending on their teaching and schools of thought.

So thankfully the discussion has created some interesting dialogue and thoughts.

Regardless decisions remain in place to be carried out no matter what this year. Time to streamline, refine and strengthen.

Week in Review...Cigar shop style

I am dealing with it all as usual. Making things happen and keep moving forward.

Love life is...   Yeah, that shit is fucking funny right now. Tossing the hand nuke on that and moving on.

So I have to laugh because the guys and girl at the cigar shop are looking out for me. It is funny how they be on the look out for me on kink stuff as well. Hell they looked out for me with the kilt and some toys. lol But it really is entertaining how they are shocked by how I am. As has been said I am unlike any black man that they have met. From discussion on bdsm and poly to weapon systems and political policies. the diversity struck them with awe at first and then they got use to it. Conversations are always all over the place and we solve everything daily.

The issues with the male parental unit only get worse.

I am sticking to being by myself even more except for the few new ones that keep my interest and interact with.  And I am probably going to down grade some more on the new front as well as my ongoing downgrading of known unknowns.

Things have gone on to spark creativity so I have been writing a lot. Inspirations always help inspire hot nasty sex writing and deep heartfelt expressions.

I am here within this whirlwind
reaping the Reaper
knowing my position
holding true to existence


I walk into this week amid the assaults. With the taste of darkness upon my soul.


have a great week. Make sure to invest time and effort into those who you are involved with and those things that need to be done.

Poetry: Acceptance of Inevitability

Acceptance of Inevitability

Arms held wide

My soul saying

Come inside

Your lips

That I want to fully feel

Be engulfed within their

Sphere of loving caress

Your curves melt inside of me

With each embrace

Humanizing

I am here to

Take away your previous lives

Come rest your soul and mind

Release your confines

This connectivity

The results of needing to

Live and breathe

Right here

Our pain

Ceases and is released

Let us paint new things

Fill up our new frame

With the expressions and power

That make us

Infamous

Each kiss

Each touch

Every moment

Encapsulated

Destiny and design

Here is where we are found

Here is where love resides

Proud to have you

In my heart and soul

In my life

Now I close my eyes

The cutoff switch applied

I am just fine

From the chocolatezeus collection  3/11/18  ©