Havoc's Poetry: Destination Foreseen

Destination Foreseen

The moment

I stopped fighting the feeling

Accepted what was before me

I told you

I love you and wanted you

As my wife to be

The checklist was there

Each item checked off

Intelligent

Gorgeous

Weird and unique

Super freaky

Uninhibited

And the list went on

Your fear screamed at me

As you back away

Fortified against my

Direct intimate

Revelation

See

I saw through everything

The walls that you keep

The fear that you hold deep

The sabotage that you seek

Through the fog

I looked at the grail at the ending

Said that is where

I want to be

We need to be

But I left the ball in your court

Something to love

Was the score that would be

So I stand back

From my distant seat

Hoping you see

The beautiful things

That I have already seen

From the chocolatezeus collection   5/24/17  ©

The Horniness is Out of Control: When it Rains it Creams

I am beyond fucking horny and I mean everything I see I need to fuck and beat!

When It Rains it Creams
 

The sound of the pouring rain

Unearths visions

Your chocolate curves upon display

Served to me fully

I know what those droplets do to you

Churning chocolate creamy goodness

I will take each orgasm from you

Take more than you want

More than you think you can do

Fucking

Licking and massaging

Each impact

Frees you

I am going to make you

Monsoon and typhoon

Internally

So I can watch the damage

That I do to you

Your mind lost

In the ebb and flow of

Earth shattering

Non stop

Orgasmic beatings

Each heave

You pay homage to me

Your carnal destroyer

Lips swollen

But open

Calling me to

Maintain this assault

On your rain torn brain

Hyper sensitive, curvy chocolate body

As you curl up in the fetal position

Feeing each drop

You hear me

Laugh among the

Stormy rain drops

I have no empathy

You will give me all

Every drop of carnal desire and need

For this feast will not cease

As long as the rain keeps pounding

I will pound you

Mentally and physically

Soaking

Eroticism

Until it drowns from

This meeting

Just think about it

What does the rain do to you

Then realize

What the rain causes me to do to you

Drip

Drop

Splash

Cream

Just you

Me

The rain and

Ultimate release

From the chocolatezeus collection   5/22/17  ©

Poetry: The Calm of the Vile Beast

The Calm to the Vile Beast

You

The comfort, peace and pleasure

Of looking into those eyes

Seeing the universe swirl in them

That smile that moves mountains

Calming even the Beast of me

Breaking barriers

Making life solvent

Whether near or far

I feel you

Know your energy

For you feed me

And I feel you so deeply

Your presence

Like the Big Bang Theory

Even in the solitary quietness

You scream so eloquently

Love and passion

Your weapons against me

Calming and sating

This vile, savage beast

In the moments

Where I showed

Need

Your essence

Filled, supported and defined

The comforts

I need

As always

You know just what I need

A small grin

A smirk even

As I return to

Being just

Me

From the chocolatezeus collection   5/22/17  ©

Spilled Ink: Demilitarized Relations

Demilitarized Relations

Aftermath of

Defended measurements

Standoffish encounters

We were gripped in

Love

Passion

Intimacy

Well until

The usual suspect arrived

That feeling of

Overwhelming

Turned into

Casual acquaintances

Rubble remains

Where that fiery passion

Unwavering love

Would be

Replaced with a

Juxtapose

Of hit and miss

Type of

Relationship

Now

Love and relation

On the move

Like carnies travelling

The circuit

In descript

Faded

Epitaphs

From the chocolatezeus collection  5/22/17  ©

Where the Hell is Cortana at ? *week in review*

lol yeah it was a Halo reference and it fits so now what?

It has been a long damn week. At least the parental units and their daughter are gone for now.

Damn, I miss the girls. lil red and little one have so much going on with life that probably won't see them maybe until august or the end of the year.  Is what it is. D/s and dating do not stop for life and all it's responsibilities.

I will probably bounce out to houston and do some Road Warriors type of adventure.

But damn I am ready for these upcoming trips like right now. Time to "keep it pushing"

And I was not even prepared when my god daughter sent me pics of her prom. WTF!  The split up her leg and thick as she is just wanted me to decapitate her date with one swing and then do her womb donor too.  At least she got her letter from Kentucky where she wants to go. But damn, that shit was heart palpitation causing.  Everyone better be glad i don't have children and especially a girl.  Love kids but all of you are not ready if i had some. lol

Wish the girls would be here because it would be a good weekend food, drinking and shenanigans.  Yeah there will be clan events again this weekend and the crazy, non conforming Evil One has been requested.

Well my spaghetti and bread sticks are done and ready.  So unlike those that can only order food or go out and eat. I am going to eat well.

Cortana, prep my drop ship.  You need get your lazy AI ass up and get some stuff done!

Journey of Kratos

It has been a week. It has been a fucking year. It has truly been fucking ridiculous and an all out war against me from everyone.

Relationships reduced to relations.
submissive corrections and tactical directing.
Them people and their daughter who I will be glad when their wheel of existence comes to an end.
Work is like a bad case of In Living Color. *smh*

I have no tolerance for humans at all currently.

This year has truly shown me why I instituted the circles of intimacy into existence and why most will never leave that third outside circle or even get in it.  So I treat them like hyper travel now. If you are there then fine if not then maybe sometime down the road.

D/s has truly been an educational journey.  And reinforced more than ever is that I will not make the same mistakes in vetting, consideration and negotiation with the next subs and slaves that have interest.  And my guidelines will be more strict and concise in order to facilitate what is required.

In the relating area I have furthered distanced and compartmentalized. Taken inventory and prepared for the next stages of war. Keep my thoughts, ideas, feelings and all that where they should be.  In the fortress.  They girls get what they need and can handle accordingly to their ratio.  But I will keep things old school personally for myself.

Right now I truly miss my Chocolate Doll. I miss having a partner that was down for our journey without all the issues and combativeness.  That was communicative and expressive even when she was going through things.  We had mastered the balance of independence and being a unit (non existent it seems in the modern age.)  And most of all the ability to confide in, comfort, importance and interest were there regardless of what life through at either of us or us as a whole.  Life is not cotton candy but when you got a partner then things are fucking Great!

But anyway back to reality.

I still talk to others about D/s and seemed to have helped a bit with folks (go figure lol)  As always I am glad to be of help to others. I am a mean, evil asshole that hates everyone but in being that I am very helpful.

Hell, my quarantine has included my fellow Road Warrior. I haven't really talked to her before her big 40th birthday adventures began I think a couple of months ago. And that won't be lifted. Even when she asked me what was going on all these times and I have not responded even though she knew things were wrong. She just says, "make sure to let me know before you dissappear."  But as much as I love my Ru and she is the one person that I am closest with on this planet, a change had to come.

In summary:

Like Tupac said, "It is just me against the world!"


Next up will be the recap...

A Moment in Poetry: BE WELL

Be Well

The emptiness

Fills me

Relational ambiguity

Leaving behind

Bloodless stains

Where heart’s use to be

Remnants

Like pages blown in the wind

From a loose leaf

Or was this just

One of those

Memorex

Pipe dreams

As I hear Biggie say

It was all a dream

I remember how

I don’t

Didn’t

Want it to be

In the ashes

I breathe

Lick the decay

From the flames of

Love and intimacy

I hear the chants of

Who you with?

As I smirk and laugh

Turn back the dial to

That Big Evil thing

From the chocolatezeus collection   5/21/17  ©

Golden Eye...Real Time

Goldeneye is a James Bond book and movie. Unfortunately the movie starred a fake and horrific bond. The should be somewhere knitting instead of messing up James Bond, actor timothy "scarecrow and mrs king" dalton.

But more importantly for this post it was a game we played when i lived in EC. Indiana. We played multi player and picked a character and then just went running around the game gathering, weapons, ammo and everything to keep killing off everyone else.

That feeling of fighting everyone, me against everyone and everything on a constant war is especially how things have seen, felt and been.

The week is coming to a close thankfully. After looking at the silence and distance that was shown I had to nod my head. The craziness that has happened in so many aspects this week from work and on.  To making sure to support, help and manage the unexpected events that have happened with little one and others that have talked or shared with me.

Comfort, support and even importance have gained new purchase and meaning.

All I can do is laugh, tilt my head and grab my weapons as I defend against all comers. Close, unknown and in between.

Enjoy your weekend. i am sure there is plenty for you to get into

Them and Their Solicitation

With a discussion about submissives and slaves being solicited by unwanted advances it made me think about the fake doms that solicit my submissives.

It is annoying that they have no respect. And it is a whole lot more annoying and detrimental when a submissive lets them do it and get away with it.  Like when you leave your submissive and the bitch ass shows up afterwards to see them. Or the constant shady operations of contact with them.

But as we discussed it is a submissive or slaves job to address these things appropriately. And as a Dominant I expect my submissive to be able to handle, address and remove these individuals.

In one case the bitch ass is friends with one and busy pursuing the other one and previously was in a former things ear as well.

As usual knowledge is key and people show you exactly what they are about by action and inaction.

Getting Older is Not for the Weak

It is funny when I wasn't taking care of myself I was and felt fine. When I started taking care of myself everything went to shit. lol

I should be like merle and try and find me someone to take care of me when I get old. But, umm hell no to that!  I need a woman that we gonna keep fucking, causing chaos and riding until we die decades down the road. That chick I can still smack her ass and say "Give it up you sexy bitch" when we are in our 90s.

The doctor visit didn't go as planned nor was it a bad experience. I will have to thank steve for recommending him to me. But he did give me more news on what was going on and all I could do was laugh and it to the list of things going on already. He was funny and personable which i like in my doctors along with knowledge and skill.

Made me think about how easy it was when I was younger. Days of no sleep and doing everything and all over the place. Now that has slowed down a tad bit. I am still on the go but not as full bore as i was before.

Taking care of yourself after you have been invincible is torture!

Oh well...

Time to armor up for the next episode. Coming to a theater near you soon

lmao

The Storm Within the StormWatch

I enjoyed watching Fifth Element at the theater yesterday. Would have been better with someone but that is life. (I will have to fix that)  Nothing like laughing at the tall, blue amazon singing opera and doing the p diddy remix to it. Or Bruce Willis' negotiating skills lol

The year has gone by fast it seems. I was asked what I was going to do for my birthday next month and I had to laugh because I had a plan but it had to get scrapped. So my answer was probably just stay to myself.  The original plan was the girls and Myself with plenty of debauchery, sadism and pleasure. Then I had to realize that wasn't going to work since they need their time to themselves.  So I will probably chill or figure something out and see folk separately at some point.

In the interaction and relating world I went back to old school me.  I stopped trying to make things happen and just STOPPED!  Let things play out how they are going to play out. There is no need to beat dead horses. Just toss them in the processor and keep it moving.  There were a few comments i think when all started to see a bit of difference but I am sure that was chalked up so whatever other reasons.

It has been an interesting transition. It hasn't not been completely old school because of adaptations and responsibilities currently. But it has taken on a darker path than before because of the few light side aspects. The pricks of cold tendrils that would have bothered me before because of love, emotion and feelings is not there or it just doesn't register anymore.  Hell, I know it is there because it is a part of me and since I am still the living dead it is still attached. lol

Heart...
yeah that thing is still attached
Mind...
still won't stop working dammit!
Ummm, I don't think there is anything else though. Yaayy!

Apparently once again I weathered the storms to become a worst storm. The distance led to the emptiness of calm.  Things organized and put into their assigned sections.  Dedication remains.

It is like internal cryogenic stasis. But that was the way that the "just let things happen," way goes.

I do know one thing. Beast mode will be let out even more as soon as the opportunity arrives for a unable to forget session.

And I am out this muthafucka!!

Ghost Rider...the Pattern is Full

To say that things have been rough lately is like cotton candy compared to a brick to eat.

There were moments I actually wanted to seek comfort. Then I realized that there was no one there for that position and I resumed my post.

I make my desires, attentions, wants and all known. In direct fashion and up front. This comes at a high risk of negative response from them but well worth the cost. Because only the strong and suitable should be of interest and with me.  So, I will always be upfront and direct regardless of how they feel and think about it. Never will be someone cringing from the beginning because of their past, feelings and fears.

There have been some inquiries. While the interesting things are going on I am observing the rest. Looking at who they are communicating with and they are not. Who they are befriending and their positioning.

I had posted a pic and had a conversation about the aspects of what is important to someone and them showing that importance. Because as we discussed if there is not a show of importance that those involved understand and can view then things are not going to go well.  As was discussed it is not an every day or every hour thing. It is not about gifts or something else tangible either.  It is about that connection that you are supposed to have with those that you are relating to.

My desire and need for show of importance is always spoken of when I am in a relation with someone as well as the friends.  Of course in relationships the importance is shown differently than friends.

Regardless, reinforcement of having worth and importance is a prime directive.

Discussions about happiness have occured as usual. But the discussions are happening because their happiness is not mine or even defined similarly. What they see as how I need to be happy is their view and not what goes on in my life. Appreciate the concern about my happiness though. My happiness is based on things I express directly to each person individually.

Well sitting here in the tower overlooking everything. Looking at the pattern of distance and disconnection. The pattern of self destructive behavior. The actions out of the want and need to serve and please. Each one tasked to their own path. I merely await the way they take their path to see where things will lead.

Poetry...Chocolate Doll: the Blueprint of Motherhood

Chocolate Doll: The Blueprint of Motherhood

I watch each tear drop

Burning like molten lava down each cheek

Vision of our child

Held close to your ample bosom

Your presence and smile

So soothing

An expert at motherhood

Even without your own child

As I reach to touch both of your faces

To grasp the blissful energy that you both emit

That glow

That golden, bright

Glow

That vision stuck

From the time we discussed having children

To the moment when we knew the results

Even after it is dead and gone

Discussions

Ok disagreements

Of how to deal with our girl and our boy

Still we remained

The perfect tandem

Dynamic opposites

To raise children into greatness

Honestly it would have and was going to be

Mostly you

The nurturing, understanding supportive mother

While I was merely the overbearing father

Your motherhood keeping the scale balanced

Well, tipped to the side of functionality *lol*

You were

Mother earth

The crazy, sexy, cool mama

The comforter within their storm

So much love

Extraordinary compassion

Given so intimately

Even to those who were

Estranged to you

Children loved you

The parents adored you

And I wanted you to be

The mother of my children

No matter what

You held the title

Personified

Motherhood

What it is supposed to be

Look like

And all encompassing

From the chocolatezeus collection   5/14/17  ©