This is the Party I need

The Mood: Out here trying to Function

Oh Yeah!

E-40 & Too $hort - Dump Truck ft. Travis Porter, Young Chu

Bitch Toot it up!!

The Movement: E-40 "SAVAGE" Feat. Jazzy Pha & B-Legit

Keeping the drink flowing. Liquor flow...on the roll.

Christmas is Upon Me

This is one of the first times I have spent a quiet Christmas by myself in a very long time. The parental units are at the house and I have spent a few days here in Waterford. Just drinking, eating, writing and trying to figure out how to play the game second life.

There is concern from people that I am spending this day alone fully. That there is some form of depression or something I guess. I just don't want to be around the parental units, their daughter and whoever else will be over there so I am thankful for being able to hang out here.

It is not that I don't want to spend time with someone or don't enjoy myself. I would love to enjoy the day with someone who loves me and I loved. I miss the christmas' with my Chocolate Doll, no matter if it was just us or with other people involved.

I have enjoyed watching a bunch of Dr Who, kung fu and westerns these days. My ribs are seasoned and I am already into my 4th drink. Next up is putting the ribs on the grill and do the dressing shortly. Oh and more drinks of course.

Well, I hope everyone enjoys their Christmas and their gifts.

SALUD!!!

The Mood: Spice - So Mi Like It (Raw)

I need that SPICE in my life right now!!!

Hope and Poetry: Hope Still Breathes

Hope Still Breathes

It is good to smile

From interactions and thoughts of you

To enjoy the conversation

The showing of

Interest and importance

Seemingly

Outdated and outlandish things

To people these days

To delve

Into communicative delights

Shared experiences

Carnal desires

Make things more than

The usual just bareable situation

Instead

I look forward to you

In every aspect

Every day and night

The test of time

Has been shattered

With the unexpected

That hated relationship thing

These days

So

We maneuver

Oblivious to what others do

Leave them to their

Running and hiding

Fear of intimacy with another being

We embrace

Laugh and intwine together

Throwbacks to a time

Where relationships were

Wanted and less of

What is yours is mine

State of mind

A light in modern day idiodicy

As I hold onto what

We share vigorously

I am merely thankful

For the reprieve

The last bastion in relationship

Normalcy

You and me

From the chocolatezeus collection  12/23/16  ©

Poetic Reality: Displaced Remnants

Displaced Remnants

A vision of you permeates my mind

Thoughts of what ifs and what I thought

Tattered ribbons

Of my heart and mind

Love, marriage and life

That was the wishful design

The prize

But it was met with an oppositional divide

Defense mechanism or fearful design

Your availability screams

DENIED

Attempted relationship

An actual situation ship

Glimpses of love, relation and importance

All of them cremated before

There was even a chance to happen

Evidence in

Shown lack of interest and importance

Inability to attend to anything other than yourself

Anti-supportive and giving

What started out as

The big bang theory

Transmuted and fizzled to

A dying Duracell

A defibulator

Sparks and shock needed

Otherwise

This telltale path

Is already apparently

Set

From the chocolatezeus collection  12/23/16  ©

The Bourne Sanction

The week has been trying.

There continues to be some detrimental, personal reveals this week. Good to know where things stand as much as possible. And being able to see the facade of a former female was enlightening in all it's glory. lol

The parental units and their daughter need to be in the vacuum of space.

Yeah, it is the holiday. And in talking to little one I realize how important the holiday is for so many. And that there is concern for me since it has little meaning for me. I mean I am not married anymore so there is no one close like that for it to matter now. If someone achieved that then I will re-enter the realm of enjoying and being excited about the holidays.  Otherwise I am Good.

The Rogue One: a star wars story, was alright. Nothing spectacular. Well, except the new fighters, ships, tank and stuff tech wise that was in it. It definitely is a one shot, stand alone movie that ends where Star Wars: A New Hope immediately begins.

It has definitely been intersting and given me even more to think about this week. Thinking man lives life very intricately.


Well...
The keys to arm everything are turned to the safety off position.
The red fire button is flashing at me with a great smile.
And I am hovering over that red button with glee since it has already been used clandestinely this year on a couple of people and things.

Enjoy your night.

Good Riddance to

I am thankful as the year ends that a number of people and things have been excommunicated. Lessons learned.

I will never deal with someone so fucked up and mentally damaged.

No to the tree hugging, non cooking whiney chicks from the north.

If you can't be real and honest then stop whining and playing the victim.

I am not nor will I ever be captain save a hoe or a sub.

Being shown why as a Dominant you habe to be careful about trust and being with a sub was bery evident.

Just like the vanilla world there are crazy, fucked up in the head chicks that need to only be in their own little fucked up world.

I don't trust monkeys or hoes.

Definitely not going to cater the unworthy.

I don't negotiate woth terrorists.

And I am thankful for the dead weight, unintelligent,  psychotic females that have been removed from my existence.

This has made me very glad I was wary about these individuals and kept everything in check. You can see the frauds when the fire is hot amd they can't handle it. They have to run because that is all they know. And I glad to let them crawl back into their bed bug and rat infested existence.

The joy of being rid of them all is delightful!

Rollercoaster Week Recap

The last week has been interesting. Well actually the last two weeks have been. Plenty of things revealed, thought about, learn and discussed.

I had a great discussion with an author, screen writer and producer named Kamuela Kaneshir. We talked about being and maintaining creativity in writing as well as how movies and tv shows have no originality anymore. He turned me on to a new book series to read called Discworld. And I have been reading his master thesis called Genre Analysis: The Gangster, The Evolved Detective and The Dark Knight, which I have enjoyed thoroughly and see why it has been used in college courses. It was enlightening since I have written poetry most of my life and a few stories as well.

Talking with lil Tigger has been in depth. Talking to a fellow poet, someone who understands the dark side a bit and has known me for over a decade makes for plenty of great conversations.  We talked a lot about dating, relationships and atrocity of life today. We agreed on how silly it is to make someone wait around for years before you open up and actually commit to them. Then wonder why their interest has waned or disappeared. She is still a little spitfire that is for sure since the time we met years ago. It is hard to believe that she will be 60 next year though and looks like she is in her 40s.

There have been plenty of discussions about identities in the lifestyle. I have talked about it with veterans on both sides of the slash and more. Personally I do not see brats, pets and things like those that are all listed on fet and everywhere as an identity. I see those as personalities and not identities. Of course it is not popular with many but oh well. I have two babygirls and I am a Daddy Dominant to them when they exhibit those personalities. (rare as they may be...lol)  Originally I was against being called a Daddy Dominant because of the connotation and outlook. But then I realized that I have been that for a very long time, even before I started in this lifestyle. First and foremost I am a Dominant, then I am Daddy Dominant to them. So yes mine can curl up, play, color and all with, me the Evil One.

little one has been going through it. So, there have been plenty of things to adjust and guide. I am hoping that she can enjoy her love of the holiday more. And me being direct in supporting her poly lifestyle has been taken harshly because of how I am a direct communicator. But she will work on understanding that more.

lil red is her usual weird self. I have to say that there has been some learning lately about her since now she is more available. Bringing harley out definitely helped (licking lips wickedly). Discussions about the past and future have occurred a tiny bit which is a big difference from the nonchalant, closed off way things have been. Progress is a good thing. She has made an effort which was very important and necessary. We will see what will be next on the learning and experience train. But I look forward to time together. I want another Mr Wolf and harley episode!

The parental units have really changed the landscape of being here. So there is no peace. And it made me miss my family. (family was my wife and is my aunt)  There have been concern because I am not in a holiday spirit but I normally am not that way. Well, I haven't been that way since I was married.  I think I want to support the troops on Christmas maybe next year if I get a chance like I use to do as a kid.

My anger remains at a supernova level. My heart and soul are somewhere out there in the universe. Love is like an assassination. And life unscripted only get's crazier.


I am sure there will be more later. But for now will leave it here.

Relating: The Life Unscripted Way

They call me a teddy bear. I am more like a prehistoric bear with the ability to be a teddy bear if you are worth it and warrant it. I do come with references that will let you know the alternative to the teddy bear mentality. They are on the excommunicated and monkey lists.

Good conversation, attention, involvement and working on what we have are the things that keep me at peace and comfortable.

My girl and I talk about the silly stuff, psychology and craziness. Because that is the comfort level between us. We can talk about much of the things that can't be discussed with someone else without issues galore.

My sub, we discuss the relation stuff that she has with her dating stuff and things. Act a little silly at times.

Then I have the things I share with Ru. It is almost everything since she is the closest to me until someone else decides to be in that circle that isn't her. But this is where I can be myself and say whatever without attitude, female interpretation or anything else crazy.

But I had to laugh talking to pegasus and lil bear lately. From talking about getting married to why we can't stand the other genders.  We discuss the past and all the silly things that we have done together and experienced. These were conversations that were fun and crazy without a filter.

I am content with my relations. They are where they are and the individuals are doing and at a place where they can handle things and I don't expect anything more from them. People function at their ability and level.

Understanding.
Acceptance.

Yes...Life Unscripted.

you have no clue! lol

Another recipient of the monkey bitch award

I had to laugh when I saw the notification.

Realized that a fucked up ex once again decided to join the monkey bitch universe.

It really wasn't that shocking. When you are sensitive, damaged female that is a brat and only wants to have their way then you have to expect the proclivity to become one with the rest of the fucked up females.

Just say no to fucked up, clueless, sensitive females and find you a woman. It is worth it and less issues, drama and psychosis!

Marking the new monkey bitch name down on the monkey bitch list.

oh, what a wonderful thing!