I had a damn time laughing at Ru last night. We discussed things going on and issues and our positions. And then we talked about my adventures together back in Houston. And then I realized it translated to another relation I had.
Why do they call me Return to Sender?
Well, it is because females have a hard tine dealing with me. And they tend to fight, take flight or try to give me off to someone. lol And giving me off to someone is where this conversation was at.
Ru and I met through me dating the retarded monkey bitch in houston. When me and the bitch were swinging I met Ru. And when the monkey bitch started acting crazy and shady she started putting me off on Ru. Telling her to take me with her or asking her to come get me. I guess she thought she was doing something to me. Silly monkey bitch, your tricks are for idiots! Ru and I became close and had a great time.
Ru and I had such a great time that we became close. That is why we are Road Warriors now. Best example of this was when the retarded monkey bitch had Ru come get me so she could violate her rules. And Ru and I hit the swing party and had a damn good time. And that night ran into the next day. Where we ended up partying at people's house until late that day. I didn't come back until that sunday evening. And the retarded monkey bitch was in her feelings and wondering where we had been. lmao
But let me drop another example.
When I was dating the thieving monkey bitch she got in her attitude and would send me off to hang out with shortcakes. Putting me off on her. Only to manufacture a wonderful relationship between shortcakes and I. Plenty of adventures and great times.
So...
These two showed that they needed to give me to someone else so they can have a break, do whatever and all that. lol As Ru said, I would get dropped off to other females with a nice red bow around my neck. lol
Yeah, that;s my Ruthie!
And yes females really do have them issues with me and be ready to send me off and then react crazy afterwards.
So enjoy your night and entertainment. lol
Thursday, March 24, 2016
Tuesday, March 22, 2016
The Final Destination is Yours
I had some great banana pancakes ala foster made for me. And damn, I am in love with them now. What is banana pancakes ala foster. Well bananas obviously and then had a reduction of walnuts, bananas and brown sugar on top of them. Scrumptious!! I didn't even have to think about syrup for once. All smiles.
I got my first custom flogger and I am happy as hell. Ready to put it to major disaster use! The red and black one pictured in my "ingredients for a good time pic" below.
Ok, putting the armored train back on it's track.
Conversations lately have been on what I will called the "final destination situation." This is knowing the destination before you get there. Or the possibility or ability to get to the destination.
In my case this has been about telling someone what I want with them and where I see it going. That would be the final destination. But as I found out through discussion with lil red. There is a disconnect there because someone can hear me tell them I want them to be wifey and then feel that they don't have to work for it. That there is no challenge at all.
Well, that is very far from the truth. That flip the switch to off style comes about when there is no more interest in and or effort from females.
I can tell you how deeply I love you and you are the one for me. But if you as the recipient of that don't want to make the effort and do the things to keep the interest and the connection then all my love, affection and wants means absolutely nothing!
Part of keeping me are the things like:
I got my first custom flogger and I am happy as hell. Ready to put it to major disaster use! The red and black one pictured in my "ingredients for a good time pic" below.
Ok, putting the armored train back on it's track.
Conversations lately have been on what I will called the "final destination situation." This is knowing the destination before you get there. Or the possibility or ability to get to the destination.
In my case this has been about telling someone what I want with them and where I see it going. That would be the final destination. But as I found out through discussion with lil red. There is a disconnect there because someone can hear me tell them I want them to be wifey and then feel that they don't have to work for it. That there is no challenge at all.
Well, that is very far from the truth. That flip the switch to off style comes about when there is no more interest in and or effort from females.
I can tell you how deeply I love you and you are the one for me. But if you as the recipient of that don't want to make the effort and do the things to keep the interest and the connection then all my love, affection and wants means absolutely nothing!
Part of keeping me are the things like:
- keeping me lusting and desiring you
- quality time
- attention
These are a few of the obvious things. But then you have the complex/simplicity things. The mental aspects of the equation. Where you have intriguing and thought provoking discussions with me. Where you gain knowledge of and are knowledgeable about me. It is like putting mortar between cinder blocks. The blocks by themselves are strong and will be there until something strong comes by and knocks them over. The mortar between the bricks make them able to withstand the storms of life.
I know there is the generalization that if you fuck and feed a man you got him. But even us Cavemen need more than that for things to last more than a month or two. I have a dick, I am very visually stimulated. But if you want to be remembered or be with me then you have to appeal to the mental aspects.
There's the key. You have to choose to use it.
Hmm, I think I want some ice cream now since there are no donuts here to go with it.
Until the next episode...Keep their heads ringing!
Thursday, March 17, 2016
A Morning Chuckle
With the way the week has been. I really needed this chuckle this morning.
still laughing
https://www.facebook.com/GamingNews0100/videos/558889887622237/
still laughing
Boba Fett... He can even look badass when dancingó¾“I need to play this game though.
Posted by EverythingGaming on Thursday, March 10, 2016
https://www.facebook.com/GamingNews0100/videos/558889887622237/
Wednesday, March 16, 2016
Templar Life Unscripted
unknown
Pauperes commilitones Christi Templique Salomonici, Latin for the Poor Fellow-Soldiers of Christ and of the Temple of Solomon. Aka the Knights Templar. Warrior priests with upheld vows, who most notably fought in the Crusades for the Holy Land in history. Each dedicated to serve and protect others as well as uphold their principles.
Why do I give this history style beginning? Because I was watching the movie Ironclad. Where a templar returns from the Holy Lands to end up being denounced with the rest of his order by the pope and the church. It is a test of the templar's life, faith and reality.
Principles of the
Warrior Priest
Stoic
Doesn’t mean that I
do not feel
In truth I feel too
much
But all things must
be organized
Placed accordingly
Each conflict and
disagreement
Many times met in
silence
Others in voiced
catharsis
My purpose
To be the one you pray
to
When you need comfort
and protection
The escape from your
daily life of sublevel involvement
As you balk at my
Position, thoughts
and principles
Whisper and scream
the differences
My principles,
thoughts and feelings
Remain
Strengthened even
Against the storms
that you bring
Coated and covered in
blood
Weary from each assault
by you and them
I continue to stand
To be the chapel and
priest that you need
Even when only your
Hatred
Disconnect
Fight
Is against me
I am
Always will be
My duty
My honor
And my principles
Even when you have
chosen
To come against me
Permanently
From the
chocolatezeus collection 3/15/16 ©
So, with my analytical self I found things that spoke to me and my journey. In essence who and what I am.
When I say there is a light and dark side of the force in me. Believe me it is seriously like that. When lil red talks about I don't believe in a gray area. Personally for myself there isn't one. I understand that there is for others, but not for me. My evil combats my nice each and every second of the day.
Like the templar I do what is right and commit the attrocities that others won't and cant because it must be done.
Let's translate this to D/s and relationships.
Being Dominant is not skipping down the yellow brick road. It is constant attention to details and possible readjustment. It is accepting that everything cannot be predicted necessarily. But it is also creating a dynamic where the base is sound enough to weather the changes and chaos.
I will be your shelter, your creator of the infliction of pain and comforter. I am weird, difficult and not what you are use to.
As you challenge me about every single thing or just one or two things. Remember! Remember, what I said from the beginning. How I am and remain. What I want, need and require. Look at things currently.
HAS THAT CHANGED?
What I want.
My principles.
Who I want and their position in my life.
The answers are obvious. I remain me. My principles, goals and desires remain cemented in place.
STABILITY
Can you say the same thing? Can you accept reality?
Not to worry, I won't change. I am a constant. Chaos will continue to reign.
So just...
Cry Havoc!!!!!!
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
This Is Not a Cake Walk...So No Free Passes
I speak my mind, my wants, needs and desires. Yet, that doesn't mean that when it comes to being involved with a female that it will be simple.
This stems from communication with little red and her feeling that there really is no need to work to be with me once I have informed a female of what I want with her and her position. It is also Ru and i have discussed in our Live's Unscripted experiences.
I will tell you the simple facts. That feeling and outlook is far from the truth.
My words and actions will tell you how I care, love, want and need you. But if you are not keeping my interest, lust, passion and desire fed. Then your presence will begin to wane quickly and then dissapate into the ether.
We can have the best sex and scenes ever together. You can be the one that is very similar to the things I need for my extreme fuckery, sadism and insanity. Being my comfort, source of pleasure and passion and bubble from the rest of the world.
But if you can't hold the things that help me even remember any connection to you then all of those things fall null and void.
Examples you say? Alright, alright, alright.
Make an effort, show interest and take some innitiative about spending time, seeing or communicating with me.
I am a superhorny and sadistic motherfucker. Reminders that stimulate my constant increasing craving helps keep a flame lit. Feed my lust and things will be better. And...it saves the humans!! lol
Communicate, communicate, fucking communicate! And this is not about quantity, this is about quality. If we have an actual relation then step from behind your Rochester castle walls and let's meet to know and meet each other.
These things are not hard and they are not easy when it comes to me. It means that you have to feed my needs.
This stems from communication with little red and her feeling that there really is no need to work to be with me once I have informed a female of what I want with her and her position. It is also Ru and i have discussed in our Live's Unscripted experiences.
I will tell you the simple facts. That feeling and outlook is far from the truth.
My words and actions will tell you how I care, love, want and need you. But if you are not keeping my interest, lust, passion and desire fed. Then your presence will begin to wane quickly and then dissapate into the ether.
We can have the best sex and scenes ever together. You can be the one that is very similar to the things I need for my extreme fuckery, sadism and insanity. Being my comfort, source of pleasure and passion and bubble from the rest of the world.
But if you can't hold the things that help me even remember any connection to you then all of those things fall null and void.
Examples you say? Alright, alright, alright.
Make an effort, show interest and take some innitiative about spending time, seeing or communicating with me.
I am a superhorny and sadistic motherfucker. Reminders that stimulate my constant increasing craving helps keep a flame lit. Feed my lust and things will be better. And...it saves the humans!! lol
Communicate, communicate, fucking communicate! And this is not about quantity, this is about quality. If we have an actual relation then step from behind your Rochester castle walls and let's meet to know and meet each other.
These things are not hard and they are not easy when it comes to me. It means that you have to feed my needs.
- Be my unbridled personal porn star whore in person and not
- A woman that I can take to events with the money makers and be proud
- Be able to melt my ice cold heart and soul then appreciate it frozen
- Understand how compartmentalized I am but that your place in my existence is the most important thing
- My love is the mirror image of my disconnection and apathy. Strong and intense.
- Your position in my life and effective use of it will make my human reactions better for them. (Reagan era trickle down economics here.)
- Engage me on the intellectual, creative and humor categories. Keeping me there often is a big plus. lol
I am a modern day Caveman. We are a bit more sophisticated and refined now! *patting my black club and laughing*
So in closing. I am easy to disconnect and compartmentalize relations. I have a high standard when it comes to my relations. I will give a lot to those that can be at and maintain that level. What level you are at with me is based on what you have chosen. Not me.
I laid out the blueprint and the plan. You will still have to work for it. Regardless of how society, past experiences and everything else makes you think.
I am Zeus! Meaning something to and being with me is what you have to work for! Even when the door is wide open and I beckon you to come in and be part of this debauchery and intense dynamic.
Well, warp factor 10 to you. And may your day be filled with knowledge, entertainment and adventure.
Sunday, March 13, 2016
The Smile of Apocalypse
The chuckles have happened for a moment now. When you are shown and verify then there are no questions. Today provided the things that needed to be said, done and notated.
Another talk with Ru and my dose of entertainment of course was needed to have those simple old school moments. What is left of them. Also reinforces why there is an inner sanctum and then there are those that choose to sit outside for whatever reasons they come up with themselves. As I notate in the journal I chuckle even more at the outstanding choice in a deficit of thinking.
I am still off of the high of the information from the educational last night. And then I can look and see what we discussed last night and how it applies. And the available outcomes are as were predicted.
I am watching the black arrows rain down upon me. And all I can do is laugh as they attempt to destroy me. For they have no clue the wonders of the darkness bring me.
lol Knowledge is power. And using knowledge and power equals making personal progress.
I know I said I was going to finish the other post. But I have a lot to write in the journal and in the poetry file. So I will make it up to you later.
Start your week off wonderfully.
Another talk with Ru and my dose of entertainment of course was needed to have those simple old school moments. What is left of them. Also reinforces why there is an inner sanctum and then there are those that choose to sit outside for whatever reasons they come up with themselves. As I notate in the journal I chuckle even more at the outstanding choice in a deficit of thinking.
I am still off of the high of the information from the educational last night. And then I can look and see what we discussed last night and how it applies. And the available outcomes are as were predicted.
I am watching the black arrows rain down upon me. And all I can do is laugh as they attempt to destroy me. For they have no clue the wonders of the darkness bring me.
lol Knowledge is power. And using knowledge and power equals making personal progress.
I know I said I was going to finish the other post. But I have a lot to write in the journal and in the poetry file. So I will make it up to you later.
Start your week off wonderfully.
Life Unscripted...The Lead and Deal with it Week Recap
Well now that I am done with eating a stuffed pork chop, bacon and some eggs. I am ready to write a little something for now.
It has been a very hard hitting, interesting, annoying and good week. lol
Had the parental spike in issue at the beginning. Dealings with relations. Got good news and that definitely helped me make some decisions. And then there was yesterday...
Yesterday I was in a good mood still. I get to the shop and the guy whose wife died last year that I talk to was there. And damn, he was upset because he had to put his old dog down at the vet. The dog was that last vestige of what was part of his wife that was living and breathing since it was her dog. And the dog was old as hell anyway. But I understood and felt him. As he remembered at times and would laugh and the tears come out I totally understood. So, I expressed my support and understanding in the man way. We laughed and talked about things. He smoked 3 cigars which is a lot for him while at the shop. But it was for coping and not going to the house. He didn't need another hit like that. But I remain supportive and everything. He is good people.
Oh and yesterday the UNC tv were filming in the shop. So I am apparently going to be on tv again. I guess I better get my autograph signing practice going. lol The lady directing was from england and been in raleigh for decades and still hasn't lost her accent. But Tim broke a bunch of historical stuff down as they interviewed him. After all the shop is a tobacco museum as well. There is so much in there and so much history.
Last night I attended an educational in jacksonville. It was a great educational. Mister Emm presented a direct and well thought out processing of Effective Discipline in D/s Dynamics. It was about discipline, relations as well as motivations and connections. I had great dialogue with him about some things and asked questions. I am thankful that I decided to go.
Oh and Friday I went to Tastee Thai. A very nice restaurant. Merle and Rich from the shop were there and we hung out and ate. Merle is still trying to get Rich to go to thailand next year for a couple of months. Merle must forget most are not as rich as he is. smh I had some thai sausage that was very little pork with a lot of vegetables in it. It was called Chang Mai sausage. (I a sure the spelling is probably off) It was very close to vegetarian so I had angst. I had the drunken noodle which was excellent and seasoned nicely. I could have gone up at least one more level on the spicy side though.
hell, I got to continue this later.
Until then BE WELL!!
It has been a very hard hitting, interesting, annoying and good week. lol
Had the parental spike in issue at the beginning. Dealings with relations. Got good news and that definitely helped me make some decisions. And then there was yesterday...
Yesterday I was in a good mood still. I get to the shop and the guy whose wife died last year that I talk to was there. And damn, he was upset because he had to put his old dog down at the vet. The dog was that last vestige of what was part of his wife that was living and breathing since it was her dog. And the dog was old as hell anyway. But I understood and felt him. As he remembered at times and would laugh and the tears come out I totally understood. So, I expressed my support and understanding in the man way. We laughed and talked about things. He smoked 3 cigars which is a lot for him while at the shop. But it was for coping and not going to the house. He didn't need another hit like that. But I remain supportive and everything. He is good people.
Oh and yesterday the UNC tv were filming in the shop. So I am apparently going to be on tv again. I guess I better get my autograph signing practice going. lol The lady directing was from england and been in raleigh for decades and still hasn't lost her accent. But Tim broke a bunch of historical stuff down as they interviewed him. After all the shop is a tobacco museum as well. There is so much in there and so much history.
Last night I attended an educational in jacksonville. It was a great educational. Mister Emm presented a direct and well thought out processing of Effective Discipline in D/s Dynamics. It was about discipline, relations as well as motivations and connections. I had great dialogue with him about some things and asked questions. I am thankful that I decided to go.
Oh and Friday I went to Tastee Thai. A very nice restaurant. Merle and Rich from the shop were there and we hung out and ate. Merle is still trying to get Rich to go to thailand next year for a couple of months. Merle must forget most are not as rich as he is. smh I had some thai sausage that was very little pork with a lot of vegetables in it. It was called Chang Mai sausage. (I a sure the spelling is probably off) It was very close to vegetarian so I had angst. I had the drunken noodle which was excellent and seasoned nicely. I could have gone up at least one more level on the spicy side though.
hell, I got to continue this later.
Until then BE WELL!!
Friday, March 11, 2016
The Return of the Chocolatezeus...Or Not
Time has been filled with changes, compartmentalization and much, much more lately.
But yesterday things looked up and I am thankful for it. Because I am ready to dissapear and travel again. About to take it back to the Old School. And I got my mixes to go with that. lol
Ru and I have talked a lot lately. Hell, I needed something an someone stable, right? lmfao As usual she brought up I need to be closer so we can get into all kinds of shenanigans. Since I am the one male that she can go do whatever with and can count on. From a trip to a swing party to a black tie affair. Life Unscripted in full force would be going down. And believe me the crazy adventure, time stories multiply when we are together. lol And I miss the hell out of us hanging out and me getting to be entertained by her fucking adventures. Even though she is still sore about me getting the better end of the deal since my fucking adventures are fucking crickets. But it is just always good to be around the person I can have a good time with and relax. That is why I have always taken who I cared about and loved and wanted to spend time with seriously. It's a FUCKING need and requirement!!! LMAO
I am looking forward to finally taking a trip out of country this year or even two depending on the sales and things. Either way I smile and look forward to heading to places to eat, go to museums and just do even more me.
This has definitely come at a time where I needed it. With everything fucked up and my super fuck it and you response. It is a nice respite where I can take a breath and chuckle to myself before I return to the killing.
And yes, I still have to deal with the parental units and the other mess going on. But now everything and everyone just matters less. lol
I just did my Super Villian/superhero landing. And that shit is AWESOME!!!!
Cue the Dela Soul Music.... Just Me, Myself and I
Have a great one. May all the things that only you want be yours!!!!!
But yesterday things looked up and I am thankful for it. Because I am ready to dissapear and travel again. About to take it back to the Old School. And I got my mixes to go with that. lol
Ru and I have talked a lot lately. Hell, I needed something an someone stable, right? lmfao As usual she brought up I need to be closer so we can get into all kinds of shenanigans. Since I am the one male that she can go do whatever with and can count on. From a trip to a swing party to a black tie affair. Life Unscripted in full force would be going down. And believe me the crazy adventure, time stories multiply when we are together. lol And I miss the hell out of us hanging out and me getting to be entertained by her fucking adventures. Even though she is still sore about me getting the better end of the deal since my fucking adventures are fucking crickets. But it is just always good to be around the person I can have a good time with and relax. That is why I have always taken who I cared about and loved and wanted to spend time with seriously. It's a FUCKING need and requirement!!! LMAO
I am looking forward to finally taking a trip out of country this year or even two depending on the sales and things. Either way I smile and look forward to heading to places to eat, go to museums and just do even more me.
This has definitely come at a time where I needed it. With everything fucked up and my super fuck it and you response. It is a nice respite where I can take a breath and chuckle to myself before I return to the killing.
And yes, I still have to deal with the parental units and the other mess going on. But now everything and everyone just matters less. lol
I just did my Super Villian/superhero landing. And that shit is AWESOME!!!!
Cue the Dela Soul Music.... Just Me, Myself and I
Have a great one. May all the things that only you want be yours!!!!!
Wednesday, March 09, 2016
Happiness Is
I was asked what makes me happy.
And I ran down the list of things. From traveling to movies and all in between. But when I say being with the people that I enjoy, care about even love there was that click sound of the disconnect button.
Yes, part of my happiness is when those I actually want and allow in my life spend time, interact and want to make me happy. It is not a constant thing or something that is overused. But it is a simple way of life in a relationship with me. And it is something that many people don't understand or have an aversion to.
I love to be able to laugh, talk, fuck and get pics from them. The different types of interactions show interest, acknowledgement of the relation and desire to interact happily with me.
Of course this is against my introverted, evil ABM personality. But this is the core and basis behind having an personal relationship with me.
And when these things are lacking or not happening. Then according to the scale I adjust myself accordingly. Stepping backwards towards the non relation factor.
I always enjoy and want to be happy. And that is strengthened by those that make me happy. Not dependent on.
So as the song says
And I ran down the list of things. From traveling to movies and all in between. But when I say being with the people that I enjoy, care about even love there was that click sound of the disconnect button.
Yes, part of my happiness is when those I actually want and allow in my life spend time, interact and want to make me happy. It is not a constant thing or something that is overused. But it is a simple way of life in a relationship with me. And it is something that many people don't understand or have an aversion to.
I love to be able to laugh, talk, fuck and get pics from them. The different types of interactions show interest, acknowledgement of the relation and desire to interact happily with me.
Of course this is against my introverted, evil ABM personality. But this is the core and basis behind having an personal relationship with me.
And when these things are lacking or not happening. Then according to the scale I adjust myself accordingly. Stepping backwards towards the non relation factor.
I always enjoy and want to be happy. And that is strengthened by those that make me happy. Not dependent on.
So as the song says
Don't Worry Be Happy!!!
The Matter of D/s...Know Your Role
A D/s relationship is when one consents to not be equal and serve another. It is hierarchy that one chooses to enter.
This basic principle is how things should go. But naturally most are not able or want to fulfill and be in the submissive role. This is due to teachings, experiences and feelings. The struggle against authority.
I have found those that say that they want to be submissive and will fight against, deny and omit to the service and role of being a submissive.
Now this does not mean that the Dominant has no responsibilities and duties to maintain, manage and act upon this hierarchy.
Through my experience I have seen this occur in so many forms. As a Dominant I have had to establish the destination, the rules and regulations along with understanding and adaptation. I didn't just know all the answers from the beginning and nor do I have all the answers to future questions. But I have the basis and have grown from them, while continuing to learn and grow. I have always led, protected and counseled. Now, I am just more invested.
The answer is finding the proper combination to the lock.
sub·mit
sÉbĖmit/
verb
- 1.accept or yield to a superior force or to the authority or will of another person.
This basic principle is how things should go. But naturally most are not able or want to fulfill and be in the submissive role. This is due to teachings, experiences and feelings. The struggle against authority.
I have found those that say that they want to be submissive and will fight against, deny and omit to the service and role of being a submissive.
Now this does not mean that the Dominant has no responsibilities and duties to maintain, manage and act upon this hierarchy.
Through my experience I have seen this occur in so many forms. As a Dominant I have had to establish the destination, the rules and regulations along with understanding and adaptation. I didn't just know all the answers from the beginning and nor do I have all the answers to future questions. But I have the basis and have grown from them, while continuing to learn and grow. I have always led, protected and counseled. Now, I am just more invested.
The answer is finding the proper combination to the lock.
Tuesday, March 08, 2016
Topping From the Bottom and All About You
There definitely is a connection with females whether is it vanilla or in a lifestyle. The ones that want, need and are use to getting their way will continue to attempt to do so. Making sure to get their way in any shape, form or fashion.
So, I made some mistakes. I did not put everything in words, on stone tablets and in braille for things to be completely understood and things not claimed to never be heard or seen. Everything big and small needs to be slapped in the face straight from the beginning.
When there are the talks where there are attempts to manipulate and the actions facilitate even more selfish behavior.
But this merely reinforced the Caveman initiative. I stepped away from it in my old age and stuff lately. Now it is time to solidify and magnify.
I know that I am knew. And I have allowed for leeway and understanding because of life's activities. But, I am not the puppet at all. I am the puppet master.
Continuing this journey in D/s relations. Warp Factor 8.
So, I made some mistakes. I did not put everything in words, on stone tablets and in braille for things to be completely understood and things not claimed to never be heard or seen. Everything big and small needs to be slapped in the face straight from the beginning.
When there are the talks where there are attempts to manipulate and the actions facilitate even more selfish behavior.
But this merely reinforced the Caveman initiative. I stepped away from it in my old age and stuff lately. Now it is time to solidify and magnify.
I know that I am knew. And I have allowed for leeway and understanding because of life's activities. But, I am not the puppet at all. I am the puppet master.
Continuing this journey in D/s relations. Warp Factor 8.
Monday, March 07, 2016
Close In Support
I was watching a video on the conflict with the air force and congress about the use and extension of service for the A-10 Warthog. A plane that has flown since the 1980s at least. Armored, merciless and dedicated. It keeps our ground troops safe from the enemy real closely.
So where does this apply? Glad you thought you asked. lol
In my black and white scheme of things. I will exhibit, show and give emotions and emotional content. Or I won't have any emotions at all. Not even the so called human being ones. After all I am not human anyway.
Emotions are filled with fear, unknown, hurt, pain and joy. So many variables that scare people so much they have to avoid, detest or fight them tooth and nail. There are always a million things said negatively about emotions and how they are dangerous, will destroy you, not logical and only cause pain.
I see you and that side eye bullshit. But he said that "he either allows emotions or not." I appreciate you paying attention. Thank you. Emotions are not for every situation. Nor are every emotion the right fit for times an situations.
I am clear with my emotions. You are in one of my personal circles then you get that aspect or level of emotion. Well, until you change that or create a need to be downgraded. Then you can get less emotional content and even absolutely none.
Examples you say? I got married after one year to a wonderful woman because of the emotional attachment and that "You Are The One" feeling. This type of emotion was something I did not understand then at all and considering my utter hatred and disdain for emotion back then made for this to be devastating. I fought it tooth and nail but reality set in. I was emotionally connected. Not only with my wife, but myself in a way I hadn't before or accepted. So when it happened again years later with lil red I was shocked but I understood it. Even though me telling her what I want, saw, felt and our goal up front caused every last doomsday apocalypse defense to come up and things to be disconnected.
See, I have always been the counselor, confidant, sin eater and protector in many shapes and forms. From physically to the mental battle with the ultra logical lil red. It is the adaptation of each that shows merit and worth. It is those things that create thoughts, feelings and questions. It is a control and a grounding at the same time.
In D/s this is where the connection lies. When I challenge, show and express things that create a link mentally and in thought. Where daily issues and plans are discussed and figured out. It is not always flagrantly obvious. But look at the changes that have occurred. Look at how long this has lasted when I was nowhere near your typical norm. Your needs mentally, physically or emotionally will not be the same as anyone else. But this is why our dynamic is tailor made to each individual.
So let me grab my red lightsaber so I can prepare for battle once again. Ok, I never stopped battling, but I did take a vodka, everclear, tequila, rum break. Have a good day. Don't be scared of the emotion and feeling things. Embrace, learn and grow. It is the only way to evolve fully.
I will leave you with some poetry on this long ass post. lmao
So where does this apply? Glad you thought you asked. lol
In my black and white scheme of things. I will exhibit, show and give emotions and emotional content. Or I won't have any emotions at all. Not even the so called human being ones. After all I am not human anyway.
Emotions are filled with fear, unknown, hurt, pain and joy. So many variables that scare people so much they have to avoid, detest or fight them tooth and nail. There are always a million things said negatively about emotions and how they are dangerous, will destroy you, not logical and only cause pain.
I see you and that side eye bullshit. But he said that "he either allows emotions or not." I appreciate you paying attention. Thank you. Emotions are not for every situation. Nor are every emotion the right fit for times an situations.
I am clear with my emotions. You are in one of my personal circles then you get that aspect or level of emotion. Well, until you change that or create a need to be downgraded. Then you can get less emotional content and even absolutely none.
Examples you say? I got married after one year to a wonderful woman because of the emotional attachment and that "You Are The One" feeling. This type of emotion was something I did not understand then at all and considering my utter hatred and disdain for emotion back then made for this to be devastating. I fought it tooth and nail but reality set in. I was emotionally connected. Not only with my wife, but myself in a way I hadn't before or accepted. So when it happened again years later with lil red I was shocked but I understood it. Even though me telling her what I want, saw, felt and our goal up front caused every last doomsday apocalypse defense to come up and things to be disconnected.
See, I have always been the counselor, confidant, sin eater and protector in many shapes and forms. From physically to the mental battle with the ultra logical lil red. It is the adaptation of each that shows merit and worth. It is those things that create thoughts, feelings and questions. It is a control and a grounding at the same time.
In D/s this is where the connection lies. When I challenge, show and express things that create a link mentally and in thought. Where daily issues and plans are discussed and figured out. It is not always flagrantly obvious. But look at the changes that have occurred. Look at how long this has lasted when I was nowhere near your typical norm. Your needs mentally, physically or emotionally will not be the same as anyone else. But this is why our dynamic is tailor made to each individual.
So let me grab my red lightsaber so I can prepare for battle once again. Ok, I never stopped battling, but I did take a vodka, everclear, tequila, rum break. Have a good day. Don't be scared of the emotion and feeling things. Embrace, learn and grow. It is the only way to evolve fully.
I will leave you with some poetry on this long ass post. lmao
Your Ground Support
Havoc
Zeus
Apocalypse
Monikers of change
Nicknames and
realities of
All of me
But here is the
kicker
The thing that causes
Malcontent resentment
My presence
Even in absence
Has changed your
normalcy
Those emotions you
battle with
Hate feeling
The conflict of logic
to
Emotionally attaching
That’s me
My mind, soul and
emotions
Invoking Dominance
Upon you
Your mind running 4
million mph
I am that turbo
injection
That will either make
it run faster
With my abstract
mental effect
Or slower with
A what the fuck
moment
That’s me
My mind, soul and
emotions
Invoking Dominance
Upon you
My slap to your face
With my direct Zeus
style
Eloquence and taste
With simple Caveman
ways
Leaves you changed
Thinking
That’s me
My mind, soul and
emotions
Invoking Dominance
Upon you
These things and more
Are parts of your
support
To create that safety
net and availability
For you to
Accept
Soar
Explore
As you feel
Hear
The beating of the
drums of
Your heart, mind and
soul
Remember
Grounded
My infliction of
napalm upon your fire
My destruction of
your world
Opened your world
Mission control
This is ground
support
I am on the job
From the
chocolatezeus collection 3/7/16 ©
Sunday, March 06, 2016
The Unsolvable Formulaic Relationship Equation
Seems like the hot topic has been relations. Both mono and poly. And I have no problem giving my position and application.
All relationships, no matter the dynamic are formulas that you have to choose what you plug in to it. The big part is there is never an actual solution so it is a science, math and physics geeks dream basically. There are no constants or necessary reliabilities. Just the application for the moment and what myriad of outcomes will appear from that formula for the next moment.
As I was asked how do you make poly work? Just like you have to make a monogamous relation work. You actually have to have someone that wants a relation and is willing to make the effort to make it work. Terms have to be met or you just don't give a fuck and then nothing matters anyway.
I have enjoyed poly relations until other individuals choose to change things and disconnect the relation. I have loved, cared for, been there for and more with individuals. There is also the converse reality as well. It can be used to maintain complete disconnection and distance from others. Where there is an established ceiling that is capped so there is no room for movement beyond that.
I can and do both of the afore mentioned situations. If you want to be situaltional then I will show you interest when you show some or we spend some type of interaction together. After that I will barely remember. In the other way we can be fully invested in each other and do our thing. You only can make the most out of what is put in.
All relationships, no matter the dynamic are formulas that you have to choose what you plug in to it. The big part is there is never an actual solution so it is a science, math and physics geeks dream basically. There are no constants or necessary reliabilities. Just the application for the moment and what myriad of outcomes will appear from that formula for the next moment.
As I was asked how do you make poly work? Just like you have to make a monogamous relation work. You actually have to have someone that wants a relation and is willing to make the effort to make it work. Terms have to be met or you just don't give a fuck and then nothing matters anyway.
I have enjoyed poly relations until other individuals choose to change things and disconnect the relation. I have loved, cared for, been there for and more with individuals. There is also the converse reality as well. It can be used to maintain complete disconnection and distance from others. Where there is an established ceiling that is capped so there is no room for movement beyond that.
I can and do both of the afore mentioned situations. If you want to be situaltional then I will show you interest when you show some or we spend some type of interaction together. After that I will barely remember. In the other way we can be fully invested in each other and do our thing. You only can make the most out of what is put in.
Deconstructed Formulaic Relationship
Chalk and eraser in
hand
Upon the blackboard
We call a
Relationship
I guarantee you
That you will be
perplexed
The answers will
never be met
And the outcomes will
be in a
Constant state of
flux
Like beginning the
periodic table
Like a game of chess
The only importance
is placement
Whoever is winning
Changes the answers
to the tests
E=mc2d
Wait a minute that is
unfair
We cannot have
constants
In a relationship
Misapplication of
Pythagorean Theorem
Nothing is meeting or
joined
Especially not the
heart and mind
Even the physics
Of the physical
moments
Leave the equation
Unsolved
Neither x, y nor z
has been solved
Even Pi is not
allowed
Fundamentally we have
broken the answer
1+1=2
1+1+1=3
And there is where
that damn Pi
Should be
Oh well
Broken formulas
Mathematical fuckery
In the end
There is only
Improbable
Impossibilities
From the
chocolatezeus collection 3/6/16 ©
So I will tell you this. If you don't know what you want. Need to be secretive and cower in your own soul. While role playing that you want a relationship or more. Just stop! And play only with those that are happily in your same boat.
It is not that dating, relations, even marriage cannot be solved. It is the factor of do you want things solved or do you want to stand in your own way so you can feel that false since of safe.
Relationships work. I enjoy watching and reading the interaction in D/s, M/s and vanilla relations. When they are working well and they are into each other even if they are apart or don't spend a lot of time together. When they can argue and disagree and that same energy doesn't change. That is what a relationship is made of. When through the good, bad, silent and disconnected moments you can smack her on the ass and she turns and looks at you to say, "yeah, I know. miss you too."
Relationships work. I enjoy watching and reading the interaction in D/s, M/s and vanilla relations. When they are working well and they are into each other even if they are apart or don't spend a lot of time together. When they can argue and disagree and that same energy doesn't change. That is what a relationship is made of. When through the good, bad, silent and disconnected moments you can smack her on the ass and she turns and looks at you to say, "yeah, I know. miss you too."
Be true and don't be scared to step our of your comfort zone and live. Unless like me no one will ever be safe if you do.
lmao
Get the fuck out of here and enjoy this weather. As Sargent Slaughter would say, "And that's an order!"
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