Spoken Realism: Entrance of the Master Chief

Entrance of the Master Chief

Armor reconnect

Armed and Dangerous

Apathy in effect

Encased inside

The cold nothingness

Remnants of a dead attempt

Finally squashed

No emotional rebellion

Pure scorched earth policy

I am to blame for

Allowing the armor to be

Removed anyway

Mere reflection

Reflecting the difference

Why there are humans

And there there is

Me

Back to my

Legendary

Murderous

Killing sprees

From the chocolatezeus collection  9/7/15   ©

Wow Affect

I hear
Feel the
Ticking

Disbelief
Even though
I felt this happening
Still I am
Flabbergasted

Is this testing me
A resolve
Path
Dedication even

Only to remember
The dead core inside
Reminded of
The Last Ride

Looking
Remembering

Fleeting
Thoughts
Feelings

Conclusion
Received

The core
The volume
The meaning

Empty


From the chocolatezeus collection 9/7/15 (c)

From A to Z and Back Again...Part Deux

Continued...

To recap we were talking about relationships and marriage.

As always I found out it is not normal to be decisive and make moves when dating or marrying someone. They talked about how long they dated before considering anything. And here I come. Get married after dating a year and I am happy and ready to go. And I don't have the horror stories that others have after 2 weeks or 4 months.

I am the man that sees what he wants and needs and moves forward with it. I don't hold back and I have a deficit in patience.  But as I told the younger cousin you have to adjust to being with who you are with. And the adjustment can be super crazy. I find my woman and I am focused. I just want her to be focused as well.

Relationships and marriage are about coming together to weather the storms that you encounter. About enjoying the good times and making unbelievable memories. And it is some serious fucking work doing it. Hell I almost got a divorce before I was married the first time.

I am an evil 40 something old man that still believes in love and soul mates. While walking the minefields of society through the tripwires of conformity and social aspects. I am in a hole within a deficit from the beginning.

Now this part wasn't expounded on with the cousins. But what I want is like a super long shot. To have the woman that is wife, my submissive, super freak, intelligent, loving, caring, focused and adaptable to start with. I took the lottery and made it a lot harder for myself. I was told I need to be patient. I know. I heard her but damn it.

Dating fucking sucks because I hate playing games with the humans. But it was necessary to achieve something that I have wanted.

I will end with the funny story of. they were asking about what crazy times we have lost it in the past. I use to live in east chicago indiana and had an ex in gary indiana. Her bitch ass baby daddy didn't like me because I did what he was supposed to be doing. Taking care of the kids. So I came over to her house to wash clothes. I am sitting in the kitchen naked on the computer. Bitch ass gets the key from her mother's house next door and comes in and attacks me. So I beat his ass back out the door. Telling he must be here to suck my dick. He gets out the door and the police are outside. I don't know who called them. Telling me to go back in the house and put some clothes on. i am like fuck you and your late ass. Then the guys from work that my ex had to come handle me got there and I was still pissed off. They were like you are fucking crazy as hell.  The cousins had a damn good chuckle at this. they always talk about how super crazy I am.

I still have a tiny bit of hope. But damn I get tired of fighting at times.


Well, that's all folks! At least for this hour

A Little Bedtime Story

Bedroom Invasion

"Damn I am tired" I exclaimed.  As we head to the bed I watch your ass bouncing and move with its chocolatey goodness.   A soft smile upon my face.  Saying goodnight to your girlfriend, I leave you in the hallway with her to talk.  

After a shower and you coming to the bedroom I mess with you playfully at first.  Thinking to myself that you look so sexy next to me.   As you lay across my chest we talk about the day.  How much fun we had and the episodes at the bar.  I am listening but your body's calling me.  

My arm around you as you lay facing the opposite way.  Your booty nestled up against me as I find one of your thick nipples to play with.   The soft twist and turn of my finger tips as I rub and caress the nipple's very tip.  I enjoy the soft moan's that escape your lips.  
As we spoon my arousal most evident.  You reach around to caress the hardness, feeling the throbbing of the dick.  The response to your presence making my body's fire be most evident. Your tired and I know it but I can't help this yearning, dammit.   As you curl up and tell me that you are weary, I rub your back and booty to try and soothe my aches.  Damn, I will have to wake you up late in the middle of your sleep at least to get what I need.   Holding you closely I give in to my sleep.

Startled I woke up to the doors opening creak,  Thinking to myself to jump up and put in work on this intruder.   Reaching under the pillow to grab the tool I lay in wait for what is in store.  Eyes open yet seemingly closed I watch as my girl's friend come walking in.  

She looked at me naked as her hand touched her breast, walking towards my side of the bed.  Letting go of the gun under the pillows I turn to say something to be greeted by her hand gripping my dick and slowly beginning to stroke it.   Her other hand came to silence my lips.  

She whispered, "Don't say a word. I need you tonight.  I want to feel what my gurl feels on a regular."   I look a bit confused trying to figure out why she would do this with my woman laying right there next to me.  My mind was frozen as you knelt and took my dick into her mouth.   Letting me feel the swirling sensations of her tongue along my shaft.  I felt my dick stiffening really, really fast.   My heart beating as I try to mask the shock, awe and pleasure that I am having.  I shouldn't be doing this.  Couldn't deny I wanted her girl's ass.

My face contorted in those strange sex faces, she looks up and smiles at her handiwork. Still holding on to my shaft.   She climbs on top me, straddling me.  Guiding my hardness inside of her as she settles in to ride.  "I want to see your face when you cum," she says.   We will see is my own response as she begins her slow grind.  Moving nice and slow long strokes up and down. It's like she knew how I liked it, damn.   The slow figure eights began as she worked me fully.  My hands cupping her breasts as I suck on her nipples.  My tongue caressing each millimeter as my lips suck them wetly.

I can see the pleasure in her.  Her body gaining the soft little beads of sweat from her work.   She continues her slow ride, still trying to hide that volcanic eruption building inside. My head disappearing and reappearing inside of that luscious chocolate pie.   Meeting her ride with thrusts of my own.  Now her eyes close as she bites her lip with a grown.  Feeling her wet juices explode and run all over my fire hose.   Her breathing labored as she continues her ride. 

Feeling a sudden gripping with each up stroke. My time has cum.  Opening my eyes to see a sly grin that she knows that I am about done.   Milking me well I feel my head go to its final swell.  The blood rush bubbling up out of its well.  The colors flash as my body spasms.   The splash, splash, splash of my cum inside of her has me on a wave of excstasy.   She keeps her squeezing strokes going, draining me fully.   Keeping me there on that pleasure cloud.

Slowly I regain my composure.  Thinking, "Damn I didn't' want to cum."   She leans forward to kiss my lips fully.

Only to hear, "I taught her well.  Didn't I baby?"  Followed by my woman's laughter as she rolls over against me. 

Got your difficult ass her only words as I laugh and she snuggles close to me.  All of us laughing now.

From the Chocolatezeus collection 9/09/06 ©

Erotica from the Vault: Boat Rides Make You Happy

We decided to take a boat ride.  So we booked a dinner cruise for two. 

 

Me dressed in a nice linen suit and you in a plunging top and short skirt.  As we walk up the boarding ramp to the boat my hand cups your ass and you smile and whisper "Stop that."  I merely grab some more before we turn and head into the dining area. 

 

As we are seated we feel the boat push away from the dock.  Heading out to the open water.  We talk and laugh but my mind is elsewhere.  Thinking *damn you look so delicious*.  The other couple leaves us at our table as I move close to you.

 

Without warning my hand massages your thigh.  Reaching between that soft luscious flesh to feel your heat.  My fingers playing with the thin material of your thong.  You tell me to behave but I won't.  I am going to make this boat ride a memorable one.  My fingers sliding aside fabric to massage your lips.  Finding that budding pleasure center extended so quickly from all the stimulation. My fingers pressed between the lips, massaging up and down.  Slowly circling inside before caressing your clit in figure eight strokes.  Your breath quickens.  You want me to stop but the pleasure feels so good.  Only your lust for me is the focus now. I feel your wetness flowing freely now.  Eyes attempt to focus and not close.  Then focused pleasure gaining momentum as you grind against my fingers slowly.  Feeling the first of your muscle contractions I slide my fingers in you.  To find your spot.  You knwo what is next.  You know you will squirt all over my hand, the seat and the floor.  Grabbing my hand you try to get me to stop, but I continue.  As I feel your body convulse at the brink of squirting I pull myhand out as you gasp for air.  Trying to regain composure.

 

"Bastard!" you say to me.  I merely adjust my throbbing hardness, kiss you and grab your hand.  Pulling you behind me we head out to the stern of the ship.  As we stand against the rail kissing your hand strokes my hardness.  Feeling it in your hand you coo softly into my ear.  Whispering "damn too bad we can't handle this now."  I don't speak as I turn you around.  Reaching up under your skirt to pull your thong to the side.  Unleashing my hardness, you feel me against your soft ass.  Then the entrance that makes you turn around and look at me in shock.  Not here you say....I merely begin slow deep strokes.  You pressed against the railing and me against you holding you tightly as our bodies begin to drip together.   Cupping your breasts our breathing joins one another.  We are in the zone.  The waves come fast and furious.  We both are on the verge of explosion.  I won't stop it. I don't care.  The pumping continues with my hardness convulsing as my seed engulfs your insides.  You feel the warmth as your muscles grip me and hold me tightly to each stroke.  Our cum running down the insides of your thighs.  We slow down enough to look into each others face and kiss.

 

In a moaning sound you ask.... "whats next?"

 

 

ok your turn 

Yesterday's Gauntlet: From A to Z and Back Again

This will probably be long. But there is a lot of ground to cover. So strap in and keep your hands inside the car at all times.

The relatives and others have been in town this weekend. Mostly for the aunts retirement celebration and people could come because it was a holiday weekend.

Myra, who works at my cigar shop decides to tell me about what happened with her and now ex fiancee. About how he got drunk and beat up on her and choked her. Which is serious considering he was a boxer and works out all the time. But I did have to look at her side ways when she said that they both stopped drinking last year because of how violent he gets when he drinks and she can't stop drinking. As I looked her in the face and told her you are grown woman and you can do what you choose, I had to shake my head in response to her still being with him after that and all the complaints she had that he doesn't do anything and his kid stealing her money and stuff. She is tall and pretty. And I love that she smokes cigars. But lawd, just say no to the insanity.

I have been watching the last season of Boston Legal and there were some emotional responses from the abortion and having children episode. I didn't realize it would set the tone later on for another discussion.

I was the black sheep walking into the retirement party friday. And the anamoly showing up at the activity center at the family church.

But things really went interesting sitting around with the cousins and one of my cousin's wife. We talked about relationships, communication and marriage. Specifically because the younger cousin is getting dragged through stupidity because of a money grubbing chick he had a baby with. He showed the videos of him with his son playing and teaching. it is a shame that he is being damaged and charges thrown at him when he is doing more with his son than people that live around their child all day long do.

So it was asked about the break down in communication. The cause and the reasoning. There are so many answers in that. Reality is that you can communicate as much as you can. But if your recipient doesn't want to communicate or can then you run into a dead end. I have been straight forward about my communication and have been shunned, they cringed and ran away because of that.

Then there was the talk about marriage. The oldest cousin and his wife were the only ones that are currently married. Me and the other cousin were married.

Marriage is important still to a few of us on the planet. It is a journey of united chaos. There are disagreements and fights but those things do not stop you from having a loving relationship together.

For me it is that vibe and connection that begins the desire and reason behind being with someone, letting them in and being vulnerable to them. It is the fact that I can see you as a woman and not just a female. That you can provide me the things that I need and we can be together to eternity.

As I told them I hate dating with a fervor. I miss being married. Which led to them asking me if I would get married again. The answer is yes. And I got that miracle vibe one more time. Shocking to me but simply true.

to be continued....

Manhood Prime

There are always millions of thoughts on being a man. But i am going to merely lay out mine. Because, the things I have heard and seen have been mind boggling to say the least.

A man must mature and come to terms with himself. Knowing yourself and continuing to learn about your self  as time floats on is necessity.

Principles. You have to have things like:

• duty
• honor
• drive
• conqueror
• dedication
• focus

Regardless of how much others (and the constantly will) want you to change to the way they think is so swell. Stand your ground and your principles. Change when it is the correct thing to do and furthers your journey. Not because the tree hugging, sensitive drones want you to.

I feel pain, just as I know happiness. As a man I manage, contain and use them appropriately. It is not for me to be some empath running around coddling everyone. As a man I show compassion and caring to humans. It takes strength to show the ones you care about feeling, strength and vulnerability. To the outside world there is only strength and coldness according to their station in relation to me.

I am not a man because each female I date and fuck are sexy as hell and wanted by both males and females.

I am not a man because of the thought that females and others have that I am supposed to fuck every pussy there is without hesitation.

I am a man because of my principles, honor and duty, my love and caring and I get it done no matter the opposition.

Being a man is severely difficult. That is why so many try and fail at it.

But being a man is the only way I am and will remain to be!!!

Pure Hatred

my hatred for the parental units and others that annoy me and more is at a fevered pitch.

Yeah, I miss CD now and with LR was up to par.

but fuck it!

oh well.

*release the hell of hell*

Tonight's Perfect Quote

“Do nothing that is of no use” ― Miyamoto Musashi, The Book of Five Rings

Compartmentalization...All Me!!

I am compartmentalized.

My feelings and love remain compartmentalized at all times. Well, that is not true there was only two times that  I haven't and don't compartmentalize and one is dead and the other is the rock.

I know others need to get this and that clear. They need someone to help them through it all to be back on the path of their happiness.

Well that is not me.

When you are available and pass the application then you can walk through all of me. Otherwise like a Battlestar everything is compartmentalized so that you won't destroy the whole ship without doing massive damage. And I am not going to allow that.

And hell you have to reserve the best of the best for the one or if a miracle occurs two people that pass muster for the elite position. But, they don't understand the value or importance of the position.

Water and damage tight.

But hey if you want to go to war. I am ready for you, and you and you. *clap your hands*

Spoken Heart: My Peace

This is something that I tried to express. But I still don't think I captured it.

It is that feeling that I get because of my vibe and connection. That person that can calm me simply. Make things better without even trying.

This is something very dear to me.  It isn't about the need. It isn't about them making me happy (even though they do).  It is about how deep down the rabbit hole the connection is.

Enjoy.

My Peace

The key

The solution to calming

My savage

Beast

You

Physically or mentally

You center me

Give me shelter from

Life’s storms

A shot of you

And once again

I can fend off the darkness

Embrace your essence

At times it is

The pleasure of your curves

The caresses of your finger tips

The mere utterances

And kisses of those lips

And then

There are the times

When you are not even present

And just conversation

Or your thoughts

Soothe me

I grasp

Your laughter

And bathe in your

Signature smile

All the while

Thankful

For even the Beast

Needs that safe haven

Those moments

To float in

Soak in

You

The key to

A deep inner feeling

The peace of peace

You give me

What I need

Regardless of location

I am affected

Infected with

Your Chocolate presence

My Peace

From the Chocolatezeus collection  9/1/15  ©

The Hellfire Club: Inner Sanctum

There is a reason why it is you and then me and my inner sanctum. And damn it always seems to get smaller when I let more than one person in. At least there is that one mainstay there.

Because even without a microscope it is obvious to see the reasons why the Hellfire club is a two member thing. Black King and White Queen. Appropriate analogies and similarities.

Word snd actions have meaning according to who it involves. And those involved have been frauds. From the fake gfs, lovers and so called friends.

I can and will love, care for and protect you to my last breath. That is the Hellfire creed. Obviously that doesn't apply to those outside.

The two that I thought were ride or die. Were countryside lies. I just refused to see it in their eyes. Holding onto a past that was either fraudulent or died from the conception.

Invites and acceptance are rare exclusivity. They come with a weight and meaning that is deep for eternity.

I had to wonder was my evaluation process and thought process failing though. Since these last two got in under the radar.

Either way the Hellfire Club remains. We are the Road Warriors!

*now I feel like doing the Doomsday Torture Device move*

Reactive Armor...A Deeper Understanding

This really applies to me and how I am and have been.

Definition: Reactive armor is a type of vehicle armour that reacts in some way to the impact of a weapon to reduce the damage done to the vehicle being protected

You thought when I said reactive that I meant that I was reacting to stimuli. Reality is the reactive armor is being prepared for things. 

I always wanted family. Me, a wife and kids. Reality shook that to it's atoms. I finally found a wife. Yes, a miracle in and above itself.  But there still were no kids as much as we both wanted them.  And then there wasn't a wife anymore. 

So I was thrust back into the horrid and ultra stupid world of dating. Basically, I knew I wanted a wife again. But this time with the understanding of even more depth. I want a wife that is submissive to me and even more connected than before. I fucked up now. I just went to impossible to infinity and beyond. I want a wife and her to be my submissive. No way!

I gave up and gave in. Still having that tiny spark of maybe I can hit the lottery twice in my life and get what I need. But I know that I am difficult and different. Even when they think they can connect me to their past men I show just how I am.  it is the reason why I have kept more than one for majority of my life. Because they needed to be a woman by committee to me. (you like that NFL management don't you?) One or two couldn't handle me. Three or four had a better chance of surviving me. 

Even though I know the odds are more than stacked against me. That it is hard to be with and understand me no matter how simple I try to explain it to be. That glimmer of hope was there. Hope...my enemy!

So lo and behold comes that distinct feeling. That vibe that I have only had once before. No, this is a fraud, It can't be happening. I fought it and then I realized that I wasn't wrong. It was that same impossible feeling and understanding. That vibe that said "this is that one of a kind thing." I evaluated and analyzed again and again. I couldn't deny it. So I did what I am supposed to do as the man. I put the reactive armor into the fray of things. Speaking my mind, what I sought and what I thought. I gave straight forward truth and knowledge about what it was I was thinking.

With everything that happens and goes into living. There is no telling what the future may bring. 

In this year I have been:

• betrayed
• envied
• the object of jealousy
• the scapegoat for not speaking up and speaking their mind
• the problem and anomaly
• the key to frustration
• overbearing and demanding
• aggressive and over confident
• despised for not wanting to be friendly

But in this year I learned even more. About life, me and living. The things and people that I have held important, evolving. The openness that I had allowed to grow and explode, met a black hole.

What reactive armor truly is?

Being prepared for things. Anticipating as much as you can but understanding that you will be blindsided anyway. It is making that effort even though you know they will not understand and feel some negative way about you.  Standing your ground when all others flee. The moment that you show compassion even when they are lying to, trying to deceive and attack you. 

Reactive armor is being battle ready and battle hardened.

And that is where I am. A bunker against the humans. The one that frustrates and pisses you off. 

I am me, myself and I.

Whether in the fortress of solitude or in your heart.

I can only be those things.

No matter how much you disapprove and disbelieve.

*ass smacks and nipple pinches*

Enjoy  the rest of your Sunday.