You Can Get with this or you can get with that (Black Sheep)...Week Recap

The week definitely had it's range of motion. From craziness to annoyance and the need to restructure.  Thanksgiving rolled on by nice and peacefully thank you very much. That meant no parental units, relatives I don't want to be bothered with or other humans. All I did was hit my Aunts house and see them and my cousin down from jersey. And his girl reminded me about the reason why I have a don't bother with ny or nj females policy. lmao

People were still concerned about me being alone. But even when I am with people, in relations and all i am still alone and it is fine. I don't have them issues.  Which brought up a good convo my gurl JD and I were having. *evil laughter*

JD and I were discussing dating, marriage and the differences with genders and things today. She is older than I am and had her experiences and i have had my crazy Life Unscripted.

So we talked about people claiming relations and they only want situations. Or playing the waiting game for years until they make up their mind a decade down the road. These are the way of the people out there. I am the opposition to it all because I make a decision, state what I think, feel and the goal, then drop the mic and let you decide how to take the information. I did that previously and I did it with the two chicks I am involved with now.

Here are the issues with posturing and doing the hurry up wait routine when comes to relations or even pretend relations.  It only weakens anything that you may have thought you had after a period of time without interest, maintenance and progress. After a time period people get bored with being on hold and that is it and will move on or diminish things.  The posturing happens because females are mortified about being vulnerable and or rejected. So they want that sit back, wait and let me run you through hoops to try and make myself feel better type of situation. Just stop being scared. Take chances and live instead of cowering.

Trying to select gifts for the two is difficult because they are difficult. lol So have to come up with two christmas gifts and one birthday. I have already picked out options. And that was especially necessary for ms indiana. lol

Drinking, eating and smoking. That sounds like the best plan until I can get some steady sex and play added to the mix on a regular basis. Not getting my needs fed much makes me a super evil, angry, violent, mega horny, black man.  No apologies given!

On that note i am going to look at my videos and think about how I need to destroy, break and dismember harley mentally and physically to my delicious delight and personal pleasure.

Sayonnara

Thanks...No Giving

I was appreciative of people being worried and concerned about me spending the day by myself. I don't think they quite understood that it was just fine for me. I haven't been concerned about spending time with someone on thanksgiving since I was married and when I was dating my wife. I am not with anyone like that now so it really doesn't even enter my mind at all.

A nice quiet day was spent with me eating and drinking. I didn't even turn the tv on at all. Enjoying ribs, swan, dressing and tater salad.

Wasn't even planning on leaving the house outside of the yard to smoke. But since my cousin was down with his girlfriend from nj I figured I would swing out to bolivia and see him at Auntie's.

Of course thinking was in full effect during the quietness along with working on some models. Plus I had to go over the jobs I have applied to all over the world.

Change has come and yelled Domino Bitch!

It is time to reconstitute life and get back to being the Ultimate Me. Had to step back and understand my mistakes and lack of strictness in life recently.

So, it is all good. Looking forward to more travel and re-established adventures of Life Unscripted.

As I blow smoke. Wish you well. PSSITA!!

Burger King Submissives, dommes and female dominants...oh my LMFAO

I have personally interacted with subs, dommes and female dominants and find it educational and entertaining.

Submissives that want to whine, complain and be brats to get their way. Saying that they are not happy and that a Dominant needs to change what they already explained and negotiated with them. Hmmm, that sounds like you are just not adult enough to discuss, express, negotiate or act appropriately.  Whether in vanilla life or D/s I really am not the man that a female will be able to control or remake.

dommes, female dominants or whatever else they want to call themselves need to get a grip and understand what being a Dominant truly is. I am not addressing those that actually are Dominants and females, merely the pretenders. For the pretenders it is time to stop coming up to someone and telling them that they are a submissive for stupid reasons like they asked you a question or because you said so. And the classic getting upset because I don't address female dominants in my general discussions where I use the word Dominant need to stop. You are trying to hard so you are merely a fucking fraud.


Know yourself. Step up and be honest with yourself so you can be honest with someone else. If there are things that you are not sure about or are interested in then say that no matter how far fetched it may be.

Some are not meant to be submissives, some are great ones and others have to figure out how they are one for themselves. I have come across and experienced the whole gamut.

So step up, learn and be yourself.

This burger king, have it your way bullshit only makes you a loser.

Poetic Relevance: At One With the Void

At One With the Void

The darkness

Coats

Cloaked in the coldness

Peering into the

Emptiness

Remnants of

Times and memories

Are they supposed to

Soothe me?

Their existence

Merely the petri dish

Underneath life’s

Microscope

Each feeling

Peeled back

Exposed

Emotional content

Decompressed

Every intimate connect

Sucked out of the

Airlock of existence

Observing from outside

Others feelings and emotions

Tilting my head at their

Self-evident irrelevances

A place

Where I will never be

This void is where I will be

Comfortable

Peacefully

From the chocolatezeus collection   11/20/16  ©

Ronin: Life Unscripted

Rōnin

A rōnin was a samurai with no lord or master during the feudal period of Japan. A samurai became masterless from the death or fall of his master, or after the loss of his master's favor or privilege.

This truly fits. It has fit since I lived in Japan and has become even more so currently than in the past. 

in my life I apply universal principles when it comes to dating, vanilla and D/s relations. These things are my own and designed for and by me. 

• I am not changing who and what I am to make you feel better about yourself. Accept and understand.
• I have chosen you for a specific role in my life. 
• We will be together for as long as you choose to maintain, work on and cherish our relation.
• There will be no chasing after you before, during or after we interact.
• Any interpretation or comparison to others will be incorrect. So get to know me for me.
• You will not get your way. So bratty, whining females need not apply for an application.
• if it doesn't work out, then we won't be friends and all close. We can be cordial if things were not violated but close or friends will not be an option.

These and some other things have been core values and tend to serve me rather well. Well, expect when I go out on a limb and do experiments I shouldn't have. But that is part of the ole college and boy scout try.

Looking at relations, dynamics and what was I realized I let so much slide. I was so lenient about things that really put things in disarray from the beginning.  Letting things go in negotiations because I felt it wasn't as important as the experience. Agreeing to things that were not ideal for me. Well, no need to cry over spilled milk. It all happened and i learned. So when it is time for me to get a sub and a slave then things will be in a more proper perspective.

I even had to re-evaluate the status of the D/s dynamic I had and the dating issues.  Realizing this is where things are and where I let them go. Semper Fi motherfucker!!!

In my relations compartmentalization is such a terrible word for them. They cringe, guesstimate and try to anticipate what will happen. And that anticipation has been what has really caused a lot of issue. I compartmentalize and adjust things constantly. Because things have to be tweaked in order to work and function at their best efficiency.

In compartmentalizing I don't express much. Hell, I express even less than I already do not express. And that level has gone back to what it was before i was married. Even with my Ru. It was weird at first but I realized I was using outdated and expired data in a completely different situation. 

I realize it is hard for the two that I deal with to accept and understand how I am. And they have come a long way from back in the day.  And i am thankful for their effort and attempts. Bless their hearts.

The journey continues. And this ABM continues rolling along like the Battle of the Bulge. 

"I am not paying for the same real estate twice!!"

-Gen. George S. Patton-

Poetic Memory: 8 Years

8 Years

Time flies

When there isn’t

Any

Cue up

Etta James’

At Last

So that the fairy tale can

Begin

The sunlight shown bright

Bathed in your

Curves

Devastating smile

Captivated

I could hear the

Gasps, oohhs and ahhs

Then the heartfelt

Cries

The sounds created by strangers

Sunbathing on the beach

The Calla Lilly Queen

Friend and lover of most things

Beloved among the masses

Coming to be with me

The evil, demon, ABM King

Hated and detested for so many things

Chauvinist and anti-human being

Like two towers

There upon the beach

We stood

Towering

As the waves crashed

The sobs were heard

Time etched in eternity

As I accepted fully

That I had found my eternity

Her purity

My depravity

Joined by two rings

Burning incandescently

In the fiery pits of Mordor

We became

The One Ring

Holy grail achieved

The Titans

Angelic Queen

Evil, Demonic King

From the chocolatezeus collection  11/15/16  ©

All Hail the Fallout

Between people and the election, their normal stupidity, the people I have been related to and everything shit hit the fan even more.

People are interesting when they try to tell you about yourself, what you think, feel and do.

This 4th quarter has been one of removal of people that just shouldn't be on the ship in the first place. I have seen and learned alot about humans lately, especially females.

So, I am going to laugh as I continue being the hated, asshole, evil, mean bastard that I am.

As usual, I will absorb, analyze and cut the head off of everything and move forward.  But it did piss me off.

My family equals:
Me, Myself and I
Adrienne
and Auntie

All hail the culling!!

Doomsday

Poetic Moments...Relationship: Chopped and Skrewed

Relationship: Chopped and Skrewed

Began like Rocky
My declaration and honesty
Direct punch to the face

Love is what was sought
Intimacy and relationship
That stood out

Oh wait
I wanted and needed
Relationships that stood out
My fault

You tell me you love me
Claim my importance to you
We mean something

Then I am equated to
Your girlfriends
Your friends
And other things

My head tilted
Thoughts of chunking the deuce

As I hear you say
I want and need to feel
Special and important

Or

So nonchalant
That I wonder if
A relationship is even
What you wanted

Focused on equality
For those that are not even
In our relationship scene

Importance
Uniqueness
Meaning

The things that are
Chopped and skrewed
And not even in a
Good H-town good beat
Way

Messages
Understood
Retained

Lights, camera, action
The only remains

from the chocolatezeus collection  11/10/16

Poetic Moments: Close Proximity to Infinity

Close Proximity to Infinity

I watch the tumble weed blow by

Blinking as I gather my thoughts again

Thinking

Wait

I thought we were closer than this

That we were steppers

Twirling and dancing together

Cheek to cheek

To our own beat

The old western barren town music

Weighs in

It’s horning giving my heart

Credence

Left to ponder

The evidence

Then versus now

Undocumented relevance

Apples and oranges

Comparisons

Or was this all a dream

Like Biggie rapped

Filled with dreams and promises

Pink elephants

And the happily ever after

Obituary aftermath

It is hard

Slippery slope

To hold on and grasp

Station keeping

Amid the ultimate storms

All I can do is

Tilt my hat

Pull up my scarf upon my face

Feel the pelt of the

Sands of time

Left to see

Just how the sands of time

Will affect these

Intimate moments and times

From the chocolatezeus collection  11/7/16  ©

Committment: Burger King Style

After a conversation about commitment poly vs mono lifestyle I find myself really looking at the difference and chasm between females and men.

So the ultimate poly people feel that there is no commitment to them if who they are with is married and says their wife is everything. As I stated if the relationship is still what you want and hasn't changed the fact that they have a deep connection with their wife shouldn't make a difference. But then again I am NOT a female. This need and ideology of competition between females gets really crazy most of the time.  Why is there a need to compare themselves to others is beyond me.

Add to that the whole disgust and disbelief in marriage and relationships for most females. And with that you got a wonderful clusterfuck. Now, if you don't want marriage, relationships or whatever then by all means enjoy. Just stop dabbling with and having issues with those that want, believe in and are into those things.

For myself there is a difference. I am not married, but I was. And I had the greatest relationship with my wife in that short period of time. Does that mean that I cannot love and be deeply committed to another female? No, I wouldn't be in the two relationships that I have currently if that was the case. Especially with the way females are and if I let my experiences in the dating bullshit affect everything.

Me, Myself and My Commitment

Loving and being married to my wife was a very precious thing. No one or anything will detract, compare or emulate that. And I do not want any to disrespect me and attempt to.

My commitment is given based on what I feel, see and choose with an individual based on who and what they present. The need for females to do this comparison and competition thing is unnecessary. Just like I am not doing that about males they done had and all that. Either we ride and you accept me for me or you die and get left as a footnote in my history.

You can see it as harsh, unfeeling and uncaring but there is the wall of china there for all to understand and choose what side they want to be on. I can and will be committed to you but that is only if you are down for the same thing and realize I am not you, anyone you know or anyone else and I won't emulate them either.


Sooo..

If you need things your way and to go your way.  Then burger king's motto is "you can have it your way."  That has never and will never work over here.  The references will tell you.

Salud

Poetic Expression: You vs. Them: Winning

You vs. Them: Winning

Each caress of your face

Soothing and comforting

I feel the connection

The energy

Flowing

Your acceptance

Understanding

Abilities

You understand

Your importance

The connection

Your place

With me

I bask in your smile

Feeding off of you

Tethered in

Intoxication

Fully

No one equals

Equate to

What we have

The you and me

Heart beat props

As you dance upon my soul

Our adventure

Soul stirring

Just a few of the reasons

That you stand out

Have been chosen

And remain a part of me

From the chocolatezeus collection  11/1/16  ©

After the Garden...the Aftermath

After the Garden

I knew what I was in for from the beginning

Looking at the damaged petals

Wilted and dead vegetation

Struggled with the decision

Do I want to be bothered

Is it worth handling

Or this just another disaster

Waiting?

No pleasure

No joy anticipated

Merely results that were needed

I chose

Fought with the death as a whole

A garden bent on things being

Status quo

So I destroyed each flower

Tore each petal off

Salted the earth

Turned something dead into

Something different

Able to have a future other than

It’s previous fucked up course

My weather turned cold

Realizing that the garden would be gone

Never ready to be my own

No feelings

Project incomplete to my standards

But better than before

Apathy in place

Nothing left to care for

Oh well

Let the garden go

It’s on it’s own

And my learning curve

Has astronomically grown

The death

Warming and comforting

Soothing my soul

From the chocolatezeus collection  11/1/16  ©

So Yeah It Was Some Good Days (Ice Cube playing)

Ice Cube has been bumping along with Ice T and Tupac.

When I finally passed out and got up this morning at 6 I was in a good mood. The music was going and I was dancing around rapping with the music. Hell, I even got my dance on. lol

Why you say? Well, it was a number of things.

I realized that my lil red and little one were in places with me that were more in line than I thought. In a different way that I thought. They have served me and everything. Things have definitely grown over the last 2 and 1 year. Things developed in ways I wasn't interested in at first. I love them and am thankful for them.

A few days in Tampa changed everything. It was a great way to end the week that I had last week. The drive down was decent. And of course it gave me more time to think outside of being here in the port city. I spent the mornings sitting by the river walk outside the hotel having a cigar, talking to the hotel guy that ran the hotel's pier, other guests and enjoying the scenery by the water. There were some sexy chicks jogging and walking the river walk definitely. And it was cute to see the kids and adults dressed up in costumes as well.

Some business got handled as well so it was productive time as well.

The things that are the opposite of what people see with me are what I need. Things like love, passion, intimacy, lust, desire and etc. I got to that point with my girls now and I relish in it when it is available. So yes Evil wants to cuddle, get massage and back rubs and all.

little one's attentiveness has made things better for me to handle. And has been accepted and understood the reasoning and application of our D/s relationship.

lil red has shown me what I saw behind everything when we first started 2 years ago. And bringing out harley the last few days fed my Beast Mode nicely. A must need requirement these days. So as she said I got my Ryback on. lol The lust, slut and the Monstar was out and it tasted and felt so so damn good!

Looking at the two of them I realized where I am, where we came from and the availability of the future. Tempered and realistic i will continue to figure out the possibilities anyway but I am good. And when I felt good today I was glad and pleasantly surprised.

Even watched the Accountant and Dr Strange movies today. And they were good. Better than I expected. Ben afflecks character was definitely interesting. And Dr Strange had some great effects with some action along with mental aspects. Plus it wasn't as far from the comic book thankfully that it was enjoyable as a comic book fan.

So, I enjoyed a rare day. A calm amid the catastrophic storms.

Till next time...Don't do anything I would. lol